I just came home from a service at a church I've been going to for 17 years, and felt completely disconnected. The minister asked people to think of the last traumatic thing that had happened to them (for a sermon illustration), then drew a lesson from it- the assumption seemed to be it was something like job insecurity or relationship problems. The really frustrating thing was the minister has known me and my husband for about 15 years (he did the sermon at our wedding, even), and should have been aware of the issues we were facing (he is not the minister for our congregation, though, so he may have forgotten). Surrounded by people I'd known for years, I felt like I didn't belong-it seemed that their problems were no worse than work stress, or a crisis of faith. My 'new normal' is not something they could understand, or relate to.(I guess I should be glad that my friends have not had a first hand experience of cancer.....!) Even though my husband is now in remission, I'm different, the 'landscape' of my life is different, and other people need to accept that, because I can't change it. It's so nice to come here and share with people who do understand, and can relate. I hope everyone has a few beautiful suprises this week. xx
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