To those of you who sent your well wishes after I posted my first blog "Where to start" I would like to say a big Thank You..
Unfortunately my mum passed away on thursday (17/9/09) after a very short but grooling battle with lung cancer..
Mum was only diagnosed with cancer 8 weeks age and we only learnt that it was terminal about 2 weeks ago..
Mum passed away at Holoywood Pallative care unit.. the staff were amazing...Mums admission was a recommendation by her onchologist at her routine appointment on Tuesday. A meeting was organised with our family only 16hrs after mum was admitted. At this meeting we were told that mum would pass anytime from then and the next 48hrs....Mum passed away 29 hrs later...
Myself, my dad and my grandmother (mums, mum) never left her side. This has all been such a surreal experience.. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think i would witness a persons last breath, let alone my own mums..
I just dont understand how we got here..
8 weeks ago we were told her cancer didnt need treatment
2 weeks ago we were told her cancer could be treated but not cured which gave her a prognosis of up to 2 years
Friday the 11/9/09 we were told she had a progosis of up to 6 months
Then Tuesday we are told she had less than 48hrs...
I just don't get it...
Last week I was stunned that my life was then all about tests, appointments and medications.. Now its all caskets, burial plots and viewings.
I cant believe we are expected to organise all this stuff when I feel like my heart and world was been ripped apart only days ago.. Mums funeral is this Thursday.. I just want his week to be over with..
I dont know how to process what has happened with so much going on.. I seem to only have time to cry when I am laying in bed trying to fall asleep... I wake every morning exhausted as I dont know if I have slept or just cried the night away...
I may be regarded to as "The Rock." But this little rock feels like it is crumbling as it goes rolling of the cliff...
