My daughter went home interstate today. I cant believe the incredible feelings of sadness that have overwhelmed me this afternoon. I cry at the drop of a hat. I miss her already. this is not a normal reaction. Although I did feel a bit over emotional earlier in the week as well. I think I have just had enough of the chemo. fingernails are starting to look ridgey (is that a word) and red also. You know the main thoughts that come up. Could I have done more with her, spent more time, talked to her more. She was here for 3 1/2 days and was doing alot of wedding stuff. But I did get to spend alot of time and talk to her alot. But could I have done more. Did I live for the moment as much as I could. She wont be here for Christmas. I wont get to see her again until the week before her wedding in March. I do talk to her on the phone nearly every day. The week just seemed to go so quickly. It certainly puts it into reality that everything passes and we must take what we can from each moment that comes to us. Its remembering this while we are in the moment that is important, not afterwards. On the positive side, she was here for a while, and my son and his wife are coming home for Christmas. This time from Cairns. mmmmmm maybe I need more Pizza. There's leftovers :) Thanks for listening. Cheers Vicki
6 Comments
Super Contributor
Hey vicki DId you enjoy your time with your daughter? :) I think treatment and our situations make us more emotional. I know when I finished my treatment I emailed my cancer nurse and asked "why do i feel like ripping everyone's head off?" lol Thankfully, that desire has passed and everyone remained with their head on. What sort of pizza? Juliewholikespizzatoo 😄
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Occasional Contributor
Hi Julie Your thoughts of ripping peoples heads off I can relate to some days. It also reminds me when I was a kid when Dad used to chop the heads off the chooks or ducks and the body would then get up and run around by itself. We thought it so funny. So I had this image of ripping someones head off and the body getting up and running around,, oh thats sadistic.. but a funny sight it would be. Back in the days when they beheaded people, I wonder if it ever happened then. LOL ;) Cheers Vicki
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Occasional Contributor
Yes thanks I did enjoy my time with Catherine. I should focus on that more. and the emotional bit did pass. Vicki
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Contributor
emotions are hard to deal with at times! im not going thru cancer myself but my boyfriend is yet i feel like i am.. if hes sad im sad if hes angry im angry.. some days i feel like my emotions are so messy i dont knw wat to do! i love having a nice bath with a good book and drink! that always helps me, even lighting a nice candle 🙂 its only normal to feel like you do, your definatly not alone! hope you have a good christmas!
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Super Contributor
lol Vicki ... now everytime i feel frustrated I will think of the headless running around. 😄 It is understandable to have felt the way you did after your daughter left. Am glad you enjoyed your time together and that the emotional bit passed. It is a tough gig the one that we do and there is no sure fire way of getting through. Just one day at a time and even sometimes we have to break the days up into smaller chunks to be able to get through. Merry xmas to you and yours. Julie
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Not applicable
Hi Vicki, I also went through the "i want to rip your head off stage" and still get super emotional,especially on the roads, Dave the road monster,lol, I am also glad that you had the time with your daughter and I know in my case that i am a lot more "clingy" towards my GKids than i used to be, "can be a tiresome thing sometimes for me"..haha..no only joking. be well and have a stress free and good Xmas. I promise to play a carol for you on xmas day. TC Dave
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