hi all.. havent actually blogged for a long while now... as a few of you know my boyfriend had stage four bowl cancer and went through 4 major surgeries.. bowel, liver and 2 lung ops... he also had 6 months of chemo and radiation.. things were looking so well and bright.. we could finally be happy again... we had such a shit year and now the future seemed like it was going to be ok... he came to my work today and i knew by the look on his face something wasnt right.. he got the results from his CT check up scan and was told that the cancer had come back now in his lymp nodes, in the stomach and there was a spot in the liver... i feel so sick and distraught.. after all that hard work after all the painful days in IC recovering.. for what? he wasnt given a proper time frame, but im guessing its 12 months or so... im in shock.. we've gone from talking about moving out together and marriage to now just nothing... the future is bleak... i feel numb.. how could this be? how will i cope with what horrible things are to come? i dont even want to celebrate christmas now... i dont want new years eve to come because i know the new year is nothing to look foward to... feeling very blue today 😞
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