How are you doing?

[sch]

Hi Sarah11,

I had chemotherapy, not immunotherapy. I found one of the biggest challenges for me was fatigue.

After each round, I would be more fatigued and tired than the last round. Worse was the day of the chemotherapy.

It was hard to tell just how much tired I would be. The increase could be large or smaller. Some days I would just sleep all day afterwards. I couldn't get enough sleep.

So that makes the balance really difficult.

It really will fall down to how you are handling the treatment (this is going to vary largely from person to person). 

So the rest can be really important, and it really is so important that you get all the rest that you need.

So do what you are able and comfortably able to do but don't push yourself too hard, because the more tired you are, more likely you are to get sick.

-s

PS. I never held back on the hugs and kisses 

[Lindsay]

Hi Sarah11,

First and foremost, I wish you great success in your treatment. I hope it isn’t too stressful & you get tons of support from those around you. These are weird times we are living in, Personally, I have had my radiation treatment postponed for 6 months~, due to COVID. The risks of having it now with my weakened immune systems are too great.

It’s the second paragraph of your post which has me troubled. You could be my wife Maria. Worried about the ongoing maintenance of the family & the house.

Maria left us in 2016, after many years of health struggles. The Sunday afternoon as the ambulance was on its way to take her to hospital, which turned out to be her final trip, she was concerned about the state of the house, was the dirty washing in its hamper and those sorts of things.

In the end it didn’t matter, she left us in May, on Mother’s Day & that hospital trip was in April. The washing didn’t give us any more time together.

I’m not trying to be maudlin or trying to scare you, but time is too precious.

I truely believe, if you make your health your number one priority , then the other things will take care of themselves or come good in the end.

Your husband, I’m sure can wash the kids and feed them. Do the washing and the floors as required. These are just distractions to the big picture, YOU. If you don’t get yourself well, and you leave us, like Maria did, who benefits? I’ll tell you Sarah.....NO ONE... not you, not your family, who you obviously love, not that clean house you sacrificed yourself for and not us, this community that wants to see you get well.

The most unselfish thing you can do Sarah is make yourself the priority. 

[Lindsay]

Oh Sarah,

I didn’t mention it, but I agree completely with Sch. Don’t ever hold back on the hugs & kisses, for those kids. The four of you will remember them forever.

[kj]

Sarah 

Lindsay is Right you are number one priority in the house but you are also a Mum and wife,Mums usually put everyone else before themselves no matter what the circumstances,but now you and your health is the priority,When I was seriously ill  a hug used to pick me up,but your immune system  situation is different so I’m sorry can’t help with that one !we always express our love for each other in our family we still do verbally and with a hug,

[Lindsay]

Well said kJ. Mums and wives alway place themselves last . We who love them recognise that. My wife was able to read my thoughts and mood, just by a meeting of our eyes. Her sister said once, how Maria always felt loved & she was.

[Sarah11]

Thank you so much for your lovely reply sch,

And I agree- hugs are the best medicine! Kids are so good at them hey... I hear you re the tiredness, although the steroids can offset it sometimes, but you just have to go with it. Which can be hard in the middle of the afternoon! Overall I am pretty stoic and positive about the whole thing, just trying to keep my mind calm and ordered, but time to let go on some of the tidiness stuff I think...

I hope you're going ok and managing well, 

Sarah x

[Sarah11]

Lindsay thank you so much,

That was generous of you to share. I am incredibly sad to hear that your wife left in 2016- clearly way too young. I can't imagine how things have been for you. You are absolutely right though, and you have given me a lot to think about! This is precisely what goes through my head, and when you're home constantly instead of at work or out playing with kids or seeing friends, you see more mess and stuff and create your bubble and what needs to be fixed, but this needs to be let go. I have an incredible, capable husband who can do this- you are right. And who gives a stuff if the kids haven't had a bath in three days. Etc.

Thank you again- I cannot tell you how touched I am. Thinking of you!

Sarah x

[Sarah11]

Thanks KJ!,

The kids and my husband are safe to hug, so we're overdosing on them at the moment! Ha. I hope all is going well for you and your health has improved.

Sarah x 

[Lampwork54]

Hi Sarah,

That's a hard road you're on with three young children amidst the covid-19 lockdown as well.  It's a scary time.  It's hard with young children to keep their germs away from you but just take the normal precautions - getting rid of tissues immediately, lots of hand washing too.  When my grandchildren were small I took olive leaf to boost my immune system.  Never caught a germ from them and I often minded children who were sick so their parents could work.

I think sitting and reading with a child wrapped in your arms is even better than hugging and kissing.  It's a lovely feeling for both of you of sharing a time together that will never come back.  Drawing with them is good too even if you're on the other side of the table. It's relaxing and gives children the opportunity to talk and converse.  Enjoy every moment you can because they grow up really fast and suddenly they're gone and all you have left are the wonderful memories you made together but also the wonderful, caring adults they've grown up into.  Very precious time.  Good luck on your journey and i hope your children know that you are super strong and doing your best for them, whatever that is for the day.  

[sch]

My wife was diagnosed via test as positive yesterday for COVID19. Given she's been at home sick for two weeks and I've been working from home, so chances are very high I also have it (no symptoms though).

My wife is currently in quarantine.

Fun!

-s