Getting back to "normal"

[ebloui]

My wife was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer in her early 30s only a month after the birth of our third child.

Now, almost 4 years out, and after chemo, radio and double mastectomy, she feels like she's been given another chance at life.

Unfortunately it seems that she now wants to start over again, and I don't have a place in this new life.

So while I'm still carrying a fear of losing her to cancer, now I'm faced with the possibility of losing her for simply not being worthy of a post-cancer life (if such a thing exists).

I'm still hopeful that this is a stage that will pass, but for the moment the signs are not good.

I would love to hear from anyone who has some experience with this type of extreme reaction to life after treatment. 

[Katekat]

Hi @ebloui and welcome to the community!

Thanks for reaching out and sharing your story, you must be a whirl of emotions right now 

This is a great place for you to be, everyone here is absolutely lovely and supportive.

Take care,

Kate

Online Community Manager

[Cathyedu]

I am sorry to hear of your troubles. I can only imagine what you are going through. My husband has just had surgery for esophagus cancer and we are very lucky to have a strong marriage but it hasnt always been like that. At your stage of life everything seems hard, kids at school, work, finances, sex and finding time to be yourself, let alone dealing with serious health issues, but these things will and do get better.  Stay strong and dont let go, even if she leaves for a while, once she sees the grass is no greener on the other side and there is no one in her life as loving as you, she will return and your relationship will endure if you can forgive and let go of what has been a horrible time. Wishing you a happy, healthy future.