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Understanding some of the possible relationship changes that we could encounter when caring for a cancer patient and what we can do about them can help reduce stress.
While it can be frustrating and yes, we do need to give consideration to our loved ones unwell status (but don't it always seem like we are the ones that need to take the initiative), it is worthwhile to tackle the presenting issue as a team and we do not allow ourselves to be treated as a doormat. In my view any negotiations are best done with a smile with a touch of humour thrown in. When conversations are seasoned with grace and love, outcomes can bring relief and/or resolution to concerns or fears both parties may have. Open communication, generosity and cooperation with one another makes a hard road that little bit easier to travel.
I think at times as carers we just don't know how to articulate the quandary we may find ourselves in. By tapping into readily available cancer support resources we often get clarity as to the root cause and learn how to deal with things in a healthy way. The first graphic is taken from the Cancer Council booklet "Caring for Someone with Cancer"
Of course, some topics are best left for discussion with our own counselor, therapist or even here on the caregiver support group as it can be unkind to raise them with our loved ones.
This is part of self care, the nitty gritty stuff
@Patches your comment is very important to me! To walk out when rules are broken is sooo difficult, breaking my commitment to help at all cost. But if I help at all cost (including being used and abused) I get treated with such contempt, my help is not even useful.