Purpleheart23, I have had no contact with my step son during this entire year.  I have a lot of cousins in the town I live in and have been able to spend some times and days with some of them.  This year my own general health has not been good and I have had to have some medical treatments.  I am still physically recovering from the most recent medical treatment, specialist is happy with my progress.  I ... View more

I am so sorry to hear what you are going through.  Have you thought about talking to social worker - they can be great to t all to and may be able to do referrals to different businesses for you.     Main important thing is you and your kids being with your family for help and support.  Once your health improves you could start to concentrate on new home for you and your kids.   thinking of you and sending my love.  ❤️ ... View more

That is great news that she is home with you!!  One of the hardest things now is the waiting but the day of the appointment will come when it is meant to.  Do you have a specialised cancer hospital near you or is there a cancer day ward attached to your local hospital?   My suggestions for you until you see the specialist is take each day as it comes ...... if there are things your mum likes to do then try to do them ..... let your mum take the lead about discussing her cancer as much as possible.  Important thing to discuss with your mum is how much she wants to be told plus is she ok with you asking questions, including asking questions without her being present.  At first my husband wanted to be the only one to ask questions ..... after a couple of months he was happy for me to ask questions without him present but he didn’t want to know what info I was given.   main thing is continuing to take one day at a time and enjoying life as a family.   take care always here if you like to chat.    ... View more

Taking each day at a time can be the best option.  Try to not get concerned that your mum doesn’t know the cancer has spread beyond her pancreas, lots of Oncologists do not tell patients the stage or estimate time left as this only causes upset and stress for everyone.  Staying positive is the magic key.  Hoping your mum is discharged from hospital soon.  Does your mum know she is coming to live with you when she leaves hospital?     ... View more

Louie, I don’t have cancer but I cared for my husband from his diagnosis until he passed away.  He has 2 sons, one of which had not gotten along with his dad for many years, 1 sister and elderly dad.  After we were given the diagnosis and the initial shock wore off he told me he needed to tell his entire family as they all needed to know.  He told each family member and there was a mixture of reactions from them which was understandable.  Quite possibly it may not be easy conversation but you need to tell your family.  Don’t worry about their reactions, this is your time to be selfish and you are allowed to be selfish and put yourself first.   Sending you hugs.  ❤️   ... View more

so sorry to hear about your husband and the changes in his health.  having lost my husband only a short 6 months after his diagnosis I suggest you make a written list of things you both want to do and start to do them as weather, your husbands health etc allows.   does you and your husband have up to date wills?  have you thought about prepaid funeral? pack as much enjoyment into every day.     we are all hear to listen and support. have you and your husband consider making appointment to speak to counsellor or social worker through your hospital for assistance?   Take care, hope to hear from you again soon ... View more

Hi LizJessie, thinking of you and hoping you are ok.  How are you and your partner going?  Have doctors been able to provide you with information about your partners health?  Big hugs sent your way.   ❤️ ... View more

Sorry to hear about your mum lin78.  My husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in October 2019, it had spread to his liver prior to diagnosis.  Sending my love to both you and your mum.  ❤️ ... View more

. ... View more

as Budgie said, you need to bite the bullet and start the conversation.  there will be tears for everyone which is to be expected.  I am an only child also and both my parents are deceased, my dad died when I was 27, my mum when I was in my early 40's.  I lost my husband to cancer in April 2020.  I have no regrets over things done or not done but, thinking back over the years I know it would have been beneficial for us as a family to have talked about final days.  I had a large involvement into the planning of both of my parents funerals plus that of my husbands.    One of the hardest things for me with planning my parents funerals was I didn't know what they would have wanted.  not long after my husband received his diagnosis he said he wanted to do pre-paid funeral to try to take some stress of me plus there was things he wanted to have played or said.  I am so thankful to him that we planned his funeral and outline of his eulogy together.  With it just now being me, I have no children, plus knowing what things I want to be said, music to be played etc whenever my time comes I am in the process of meeting with funeral director to discuss my prepaid funeral and what I want to happen on the day.   to me a funeral is the celebration of our loved ones life ..... who else is better to tell their story and decide how to celebrate that life than the person themselves.    during the last couple of months of my husbands life he and I talked about what life was going to be like for me after he was gone.  it gave him a chance to also express his worries and concerns which he needed to be able to share with me.  he used to say he was scared about who was going to be on the other side so we used to talk about our respective family members who have already passed away and would be waiting to welcome him to his new home, something we both found gave us a feeling of peace.  there was many tears during these conversations, similar writing these words I find myself in tears.  The things related to death and dying that lots of people struggle with is means we are saying a final goodbye to someone who we deeply love that we will never be able to see or hear again in our life .   lots of hospitals have social workers and chaplains that, if your mum is in hospital could come and have a chat with you all as a family.  some towns also have Pallative Care units and there is usually a counsellor specifically trained to talk to patients and family members during these times.  It is not a pleasant or nice conversation but death is something that comes to us all when it is our time.  the quicker you can start the conversation the better   take care         ... View more