My hubby was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia just before our first wedding anniversary. Was given last rites. However, two bone marrow transplants, full body radiation 3 days in a row, gall stones, aspergillosis, Krohn’s Disease and assorted other crap, later, he survived. I couldn’t be upset about the ruination of our marriage (became nurse, not wife) or the loss of ability to have the children or our financial ruin, because he lived and thats all that was important. 15 years later, he was diagnosed with Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer, terminal. I lost him 6 weeks ago after a long fight of 15 months. Now Im just angry, sad and damaged. Has anyone else had this happen?
It must be very difficult for you to focus your mind, and heart, on the life ahead of you. I hope you and your hubby experienced joy in those 15 years (without the dark cloud of relapse hanging over you). I am also in a situation that has shattered hopes. I dated my partner for a brief time before he was diagnosed with AML. I had to fast-forward moving in with him so as to be able to become carer without the burden of keeping up with rent. Post BMT we lived in the city for 4 months, to enable daily visits to the hospital. We are now 8 months into the journey and he is in remission. Even though he worked so hard to beat this demon, he is not living his life. He has type 2 Diabetes and consumes sugar in vast amounts, his diet is appalling and exercise is non-existant. He is a gentle soul but living with him is soul-crushing. As you can imagine, there is so much more to the story. Every day I live with thoughts of leaving. Thank you for your post. I don't wish this on anyone but it helps to not be alone.
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