New to cancer - Crying all the time

[Darren71]

Hi im new to the site and am wanting to know, ask for some help. I was diagnosed with Renal cell carcenoma which has moved into my bones - causes lots of pain and into my lungs and spot on my brain.......i dont want that to sound like i'm feeling sorry for myself but i am having troubles dealing with it. I am yet to start immunotherapy but that will be next week, i actually came online to see if there was a number to call to speak to someone so i dont know if this is the roght way of doing it. There are alot of blogs i started to read with people with different types and dealing with different issue's, i was looking for just some comfort of like minded people living through treatment and what i can expect...im crying as i type...is this normal.

[LindaG]

Hi Darren71, sorry your symptoms are so bad. We’re all different in our responses and some people can stay positive most of the time while some of us have anxiety and cry often. That’s how it was for me and I just had to go with it. I had a very supportive husband and daughter who listened and comforted. Every day was different. If you’re in pain it makes you more emotional too. Once you start the treatment hopefully you feel better in time. Hope you have lots of kind people around you. 🙏💕 Linda G 

[Darren71]

Hi Linda G, Thanks for your response, i was in a really bad place yesterday and just needed to talk to someone so reached out through the forum, I ended up calling Lifeline, I do have a really supportive wife and son but they were both not available for me at my time of crisis. Lifeline helped me walk through my thoughts and feelings and settled me enough to understand my reaction is quite normal. Thank you for your post.

[LindaG]

Hi Darren71, that’s great you got help from lifeline. Yes you are normal and it’s good you can be real about your feelings. All the best for your treatment. I’ll keep you in my prayers 🙏. LindaG 

[Wegotthis]

Darren 

I hope all is well with you and your family today. 

Your post is very moving. I respect you for keeping it real . I wish I could be more like you when it comes to sharing how I really feel. 

I always suffer in silence because I don't show real emotions. I have no problem showing love to my wife and family but I struggle with staying it. I'm working hard to improve it.

Please keep us updated on how things are going for you and your family. 

[Darren71]

Thanks Wegotthis, i think you are being real by saying that you have problem sharing i hope you can talk and share with in time as ive found since posting this ive been able to re-focus for me on whats important and not allow fear of the unknown drag me to a place where i see no way out. My real issue i was diagnosed quite some time ago and only done 1 lot of radiotherapy as i tried to get on different trials. Now its spread more and has resulted in me not being able to complete the trial so i start my Immunotherapy on Monday. I am inspired by all the people i have met here and all have different stories, My family are struggle to see me so upset all the time but are so supportive i am a very lucky man. Lifeline was a blessing for me at the right time, i spoke to a total stranger and poored out my heat with no regrets, thats hard to do but they really helped me focus on moving forward. Reach out if youd like to talk to someone that understand what your going through as living it you fing kindred spirits. you helped me here i hope i have helped you. Darren

[Darren71]

Today is another one of those days, A tough one, Im having alot more tough days than easy ones and its deosnt seem to metter what i try i get a day where something new pops up to deal with......id like to be poisitive but finding it hard to be so....s i said today is a tough day....id love o post better days......#KCB Kick Cancer Butt i wish i could have some self resiliance
Darren - A tough Day.....

[LindaG]

Hi Darren71, sorry you’re having a bad day. As you say, some days are just like that. I think we would all understand the ups and downs with your emotions. Hope tomorrow is better. Hope your level of pain is under control. Will still keep you in my prayers 🙏💕. Linda G 

[Wegotthis]

Sorry to hear about you having a tough day my friend. 

Is it because of pain or are you struggling mentally?

Do you have any hobbies that you like or maybe you have one you would like to start 

[Paul71]

Hey Darren.  Looks like you are the same age as me.  I have RCC too.  Stage IV.  I’m 18 months in.  Trust me, it gets easier to accept.  There’s a forum called Smart Patients, with a sub forum called Kidney Cancer.  I get a lot of comfort from being on there.  Some people have been battling stage IV RCC  for 15+ years with the various different treatments which re available now.   It’s more encouraging than the 5 year prognosis you will see when you hit google.   Never search cancer on google or Facebook.  That will definitely get you depressed.

Stay strong my friend.  You will have years ahead of you put the path will be challenging.

cheers

Paul