I'm a 33 year old man. I was diagnosed with a late stage rectal cancer on july 10th last year.
Primary couldn't be any lower in my Rectum, so that has to go.
Mets (x4) in my liver, now removed. this was done before the primary to preserve my life.
Minor Met (suspected second) in my left lung.
So far I've had chemo, liver resection, more chemo and radiation, and I am to have descending colon removed from my navel down, including my anus. that's on April 30.
The weird thing for me is that the anticipation of this surgery is the most frightening part. The diagnosis and then escalation of the state of my condition and liver surgery didn't make me as afraid as I thought it would.
So far I have been very lucky, the Liver mets were spread across my liver, but a clear margin in the centre meant the could save some, then it grew back from 50% after surgery to approx. 90%.
Chemo has been extremely effective and so has radiation. If I were a man of faith I'd think someone was helping.
I'm not entirely sure why I am here, I do find myself in a world of people who struggle to understand what I'm going through, I hope that I can find some good help here when i need it and in turn I can provide it for others.
Anticipatory anxiety is a bitch I agree. I often get more worried imagining than anything else. We humans hate uncertainty I think so we fill it with imaginary horrors. You certainly sound like you have been in the wars though. People on this site do get the cancer journey though even if not exactly the same place at the same time. I really wish you all the best with your treatment.
The waiting and wondering part is a bitch. It is the worst time because the mind wonders. I always try and keep my mind right in the "here and now" and that for me is such an internal struggle and yet it works because I am no longer focussing on the worry, more the keeping the mind in the right place. You sound like you have already been through quite a lot and am not suprised that you are feeling a bit nervous about upcoming surgery. Hope you start to feel a bit better soon. Hang in there!
Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.