Hi Frangipani,
It's been 7 months since i had the expanders put in and am due to have the implants exchange done the end of july. Leading up to the surgery I was petrified, I had been traumatised by the nurses when they took the tubes out after the bilateral mastectomy. I found it to be very painful for the first couple of months and thankfully I don't have any more pain and am very happy with the results so far. The decision to have or not have the surgery should be yours to make, it is a very big decision to have the surgery. If you know in yourself what you will be happy doing that's all that matters. Why do your family think they will be depressed?
When I was diagnosed I was told the right breast had to be removed and that I would have a lumpectomy on the left. I told my surgeon that I wanted both removed. He tried to talk me out of it but I told him that I knew I would be distressed seeing no breast on the right side and a disfigured breast on the left, so he removed both.
Cancer brings a different perspective and meaning to life. Sometimes it takes a while for others to see and understand what you do.