Sorry, just realised that I posted the wrong website address - it should be: www.merrywidow.me.uk. ... View more

I'm so, so sorry to hear your very sad news. Big hugs to you and your family right now. What a huge loss. Sadly, my husband Aron also lost his battle on 14 March (after 2 yrs, 4 mths fighting it). He died 1 month before our son turned 2. We were so grateful for the time that we had together until the end - but it still doesn't make up for the tough journey we've all had to go through. And of course we still face another tough journey ahead while we try to keep living our lives without them. I don't know you guys, but I really feel for you and I'm just so sorry... I really hope that his funeral goes OK and that you may feel some peace in the upcoming weeks - just go slow and don't do anything that you're not ready to do yet. One day at a time is how I live at the moment - and some days are definitely better than others. Something else that I have found useful is a book called "Death... and how to survive it" by Kate Boydell (she lost her husband in their 30s and was left with 2 small kids). It's a really great book (I ordered it as an e-book from the UK Book Depository website - they also have worldwide free delivery). She also has a great website that she started for young widows called www.themerrywidow.co.uk. It has heaps of good resources. And the whole point of her book and website is really just to let other young widows and widowers know that we're not alone and others have gone through it too - and what she has found useful. It really has helped me. Best wishes to you and your family - and please stay in touch. Lynne. ... View more

Hi Julie, Sorry to hear about your friend - but that's great to hear that she's been given the chance to try Abraxane, and fully funded too - that's fantastic. The latest results being published on Abraxane in pancan are pretty exciting so far. We're talking to our doctor tomorrow to see if we can get it here in NZ, and we'll then switch from Paclitaxel to that drug straight away. And if we can't get it here, then we'll be off to Australia to try it over there. Either way, it will be very expensive I'm sure (it's not funded in NZ) - but we have to give it a go. I'm starting to think about some fundraising options. Will keep you all posted on developments... Cheers, Lynne. ... View more

Oh Amanda, I'm so sorry to hear your story. So hard for you guys. But it sounds like you're having a great attitude about it all. It would be great to stay in touch - and especially through the tough times. I think it's really important to use these types of forums to vent or just stay in touch - because so many of our friends and families just don't know what we're going through - or what to do or say at the critical times... And it's so tough trying to do this with little ones too. My 1 year old has been very demanding and challenging this week due to teething issues - so, not much sleep or time to do anything other than look after him... Which, of course, is pretty hard when you've also got a sick husband who needs your time and attention too. I have to keep reminding myself to look after me too..! :) Big hugs to you and your family today. And yes, please stay in touch... :) Lynne. ... View more

Hi Sylph, Sorry for the very late reply - I find it hard to get on the PC these days with hubby and baby demands!! But it's great hearing from you. :) Aron has been on Paclitaxel now for 1 month. He has it via IV once a week for 3 weeks, then 1 week off. We are going back tomorrow to start the next cycle of 3 weeks. He's been feeling pretty good with it so far - hardly any side effects (a few joint pain issues, and a few days with fevers that are manageable) - but otherwise, pretty good. He likes that he doesn't get a foggy head with this one. The major drawback however is that you lose your hair :(. And he's been pretty lucky so far that he hasn't had to deal with that yet with all the other drugs. So, after 1 month of taking it, his hair is almost all gone now - we're off to buy him some hats this afternoon... He's got a great attitude about it all - and I'm sure he'll have some down days about it - but hopefully it's all worth it! From our point of view, it's definitely worth a try. And it definitely hasn't been as toxic as some of the previous drugs. Hope your friend makes the right choice for her. :) All the best, Lynne. ... View more

Hi Vera, My husband Aron was diagnosed with pan can in November 2008 at the age of only 34 years old. At that time I was 20 weeks pregnant with our 1st child (Matthew). He just turned 1 a few weeks ago which was pretty special. :) As you can imagine, we were pretty shocked with the diagnosis - which sadly was all the worst kind of news. He had stage IV metastatic pan can which had spread to his liver (in a very bad way), his lungs and lymph nodes. Doctors didn't hold out much hope that he would make it to see our son's birth. It was all incredibly stressful and pretty dire... But, here we are in May 2010 and he is still here with us and doing pretty well. He has tried a number of different chemo treatments - starting with gemcitabine alone, then capecitabine added into the mix for nearly a year - and then recently we tried erlotinib (unsuccessful). He has just started paclitaxel this week. We know we are starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel in terms of treatments available, but we take each day as it comes and are just incredibly grateful for the time that we have together as a family. It is certainly tough as a carer when facing this horrible disease. I definitely have my up days and down days (I describe it as a roller coaster ride - you just have to go with wherever it takes you on the day). It would be great to stay in touch with you (& others on this forum) in the future. I've only just found it - we don't have anything like this in NZ (we live in Wellington). I really hope you and your husband are doing OK. :) Best wishes, Lynne. ... View more