Hi,
I'm Kate in Vic. It's almost 4.30am and yet another night without sleep since we found out my mum has bladder cancer. She went into hospital Wednesday for surgery Thursday on a suspected GYN-mass, and the first part of the op was to put a stent in her left ureter because supposedly the mass had squashed it shut.
So it was during the first part of the surgery that they discovered it was bladder cancer that was also wrapped around her left ureter, not a gyn-thing, they did the biopsy but the major surgery we'd expected didn't happen. And now we're in a holding pattern, waiting for Monday when we hope to get the results.
Everything seems to be going wrong though.
It started off wrong - her GP seemed bored and even went to sleep during one consult, we wasted weeks with him. Then our regular GYN has lost the results of all of both of our previous visits, so has no record of us ever having seen him, and was going off on a conference so couldn't see us.
We found a new GYN with a good rep, he did some tests and referred us to a guy who apparently is the holy grail of GYN-docs, and he is friends with the doctor who did Sam Newman's prostate! Finally we had 2 great docs, which was something of a relief.
But the Holy Grail doc dropped out when it wasn't a gyn-thing, and now my mum tells me that we're also losing the Sam Newman-doc and getting one of his "colleagues". There's also some talk that they may not be able to fit her in for surgery next week, and that she might want to go home, but she has cachexia and pain and I really feel that the best place for those to be treated is hospital, with a surgery that happens sooner rather than later - there have been too many delays already!
My mum has 2 choices at the moment - excruciating pain, or drug haze - so she wants me to be there when the docs talk to her, but I'm on public transport and don't want to risk travelling alone in the dark, and the docs keep coming when I'm not there, even though I've been there every day for 6-7 hours at a time.
My mum and I are really close, and I'm just blind-panic-scared all the time now, and I hate the way this is going, with losing the good doc after we found him, an unknown surgery date, and the hospital seemingly wanting to put her out-of-sight,out-of-mind.
I really need some advice. Thankyou.
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