Hi Purple Angel, Yes Cancer is LIFE CHANGING - there is no going back to the PRE Cancer days, even if there is "remission". That is the same with all LIFE EXPERIENCES though Good or Bad... but the Cancer Journey certainly puts you onto a different Life "Vector".... most realise the truly important things in Life, a tough way to learn the lessons, but worth it in the end. Hard though to see some family and friends who still just don't really get why you've changed. Good Wishes to all on the cancer journey and their families! Sam ... View more

Hi Purple Angel, Yes Cancer is LIFE CHANGING - there is no going back to the PRE Cancer days, even if there is "remission". That is the same with all LIFE EXPERIENCES though Good or Bad... but the Cancer Journey certainly puts you onto a different Life "Vector".... most realise the truly important things in Life, a tough way to learn the lessons, but worth it in the end. Hard though to see some family and friends who still just don't really get why you've changed. Good Wishes to all on the cancer journey and their families! Sam ... View more

Hi Lynda, I had a different type of cancer nearly 10yrs ago and at that time Radiotherapy was recommended. Whatever you decide, do your research, understand the possible side effects both short and long term, and then most importantly - OWN the decision. I found this has become important for me along the recovery journey, I needed to feel the treatment plan was my decision, it gave me back some of the "control" that the cancer diagnosis eroded. Go well - stay positive & all the best during your recovery. sam ... View more

Hi Jules, Congrats - on your first day back at work! Have you gone back part time or full time? Don't overdo things, though. Great news about the new house & land! Sam ... View more

Hi Maddie, I feel for your heartache. Not sure how close your friend is, but yes people can be insensitive. Sometimes, I think they are so afraid of the "C" word that they act strangely, either trying to ignore it totally, or they try to "cover" it by being to the point and totally clinical. I'll never forget bumping into a ex-colleague a few years after the Cancer Experience and the comment was "Oh your still alive"... that was definitely "left field".. Try not to dwell on the hurt, focus instead on the precious time you have together. Life is uncertain for all of us, you just have to listen to the tragedies on the roads to realise, none of us knows when our number will be called... Tears can be good, it helps the "adjusting" process. Take care... Sam ... View more

Hi Daniel, It's good that you are talking to someone face to face, it validates your feelings, and brings confidence that you are not going crazy. I think your reaction seems to be a very normal one, for someone how had been told to expect the worst. To adjust to that, was a huge "mind set shift", and now you have to do a 180 turn, and start considering many years ahead. Wow! Sometimes, it is easier to deal with what we know, many people live in unhappy situations, fearful, of making a change, and things getting worse, but try to look at the plans you maybe thought you'd never get to fulfil, choose one and focus intently on achieving it., maybe not for a few yrs, but eventually. You have hope of many more years with family and I'm sure they'd far rather have gone through this journey and still have you here, than the alternative. You will build a new "post cancer" life, it will incorporate some of your old life and some new things, but life would still have moved on, even if you hadn't had cancer, it would have changed, although perhaps more under your control. Life is uncertain, but there is always a tiny glimmer of hope, as you on your journey have proved. Enjoy each day - every small step forward or towards a goal is one step less to take, no matter how slowly or how many detours, the destination will be worth it. Go well! Sam ... View more

Lioness, This is an inspiring journey. Congratulations to your husband on this major adjustment to life & to you for being such a great support. It nearly 10yrs since I survived cancer, but there are still occasional "why me" moments... and certainly the financial stress is an unspoken side effect, especially for those who are in business or on contract. I am about to move to yet another rental property, I can see my dream of owning my own house slowly evaporate, with each year that passes. It's sad that you didn't get to see your Dad, but there is only so much one person can do, not much consolation though.... and how many times have I thought "I just want my old life back".... but looking back now, I can see, despite the financial constraints, the uncertainty, the need to work reduced hours, I feel I am a better person for it. This concrete jungle, (bigger houses/cars), is losing focus of the truly important things in life. So long as there is a decent roof over our heads, enough food, clothing and cash flow to pay the bills, the rest is "fairy floss" nice to have, but not trade a loved one for. A support network helps a great deal, but surprisingly even without much support, there is an inner strength you find "to lift and carry on". I watch my siblings and other extended family, as they leave the primary emotional care of my ageing Mum to me and think "wow I wouldn't want to be you". Your husband will be an inspiration to the youngsters learning their trade, no matter how tough life gets, if you battle on, eventually their will be some light at the end of the tunnel. Go well! Sam ... View more

Hi Yes the cancer "experience" really is only understood by those who have gone through it. It is a traumatic event, sudden and unexpected, life changing. Yet as hard as it may seem to "survive", it is intrinsic to our core. Take things slowly, let your mind "catch up" to the experience your body has been through. Slowly, your mind and soul will help to heal your body, if you can accept, "life after cancer", it's pitfalls, it's hurdles and sometimes it's newly created barriers (especially the tiredness factor). Remember though, life is uncertain, it always was, it is only after cancer that this fact comes into clear focus. A major car accident, a bushfire or a flood could also create such an emotional shift, rocking our very foundations ... but for this group it was cancer. The emotional side of the experience shouldn't be "undersold", yet it is or was at the time of my treatment. Stay positive, get plenty of rest, especially in the first few years after treatment & focus on the beautiful things in life, nature - birdsong, beaches and the sound of the sea. Meditation CD's are very good, at stilling the mind of "what-if's". Go Well! Sam ... View more

Hi Tim, Seems like you've been through a lot just lately, it's good that you were home for Christmas, hope you get to enjoy some of the Jan holidays with your family, doing things you enjoy. Stay positive. Sam ... View more

Hi Tim, I guess it depends on the type of cancer and the prognosis. It is life changing though for most I think. Doing things you normally enjoy, does help, it takes the stress levels down, which helps you cope with the treatments too. Music is great! I think you do get "used" to your diagnosis, but it takes time, it is a wake up call, though. There is a balance between living a "normal" life and accepting life has changed, you can never go back to the pre-cancer "blissful ignorance", but it is much better to know (i) there is a battle to win & (ii) what the "enemy" is. I hope you & your wife, manage to adjust to the news, get information and find some peace over Christmas and summer holiday. This site is really good for the days when you just want to scream, coz we all remember the "shell shocked" feelings Go well. Sam ... View more