Hello there. First I will say that I am Norwegian, so I am sorry if my Norwegian is not perfect, and please ask if it is something you dont understand.When I read your words, the first i felt was that it was very familiar. My treatment in 2003 was also like hell, even though I managed it well mentally during treatment, I felt completly flat some months after treatment. I really felt more ill, than when I was diagnosed. But a normal condition is fatigue, there is acute and chronic fatigue syndrome,so the first come and dont stay so long, and chronic it is in words. it is for 6 months or longer and in the fatigue syndrome it is not only the tiredness. You can feel scared, lonely, and have many other symphtoms. Search it up and rad about it if you have not heard about it. Sometimes Fatigue is the first sign of the cancer itself, but, it can come during treatment or just short time after. But they have also seen Fatigue as a sideeffect on longterm-survivors too. People who survived many years, and then started to get "mystic" symphtoms long time after. I will suggest that you ask your doctor about Fatigue. One of the reason people get scared and lonely is that you had all the doctors and nurses around you when you went through treatment, and now you have to trust that everything is ok. I know I felt sometimes...What if they have missed something, and developed an eating disorder because of problems with my intestines. I became a Swing door patient, who was more in the hospital, than home with my family. Actually I was more in the hospital after treatment, then during treatment. But even though I missed my family It felt so safe to know that I was a plase were they could help me if something happend. I dont mean that your and my story is the same. For among 100 persons with cancer, it is 100 different stories, and all of them are uniq stories, and will let you know that it is normal to get reactions after treatment, even though it went so fine during the chemo-hell. People expect you to be further into the rehab than you are, and maybe you too also wished you were further. But allow yourself to hurry SLOWLY, if you understand what I mean. It is now 8 years sinse I got ill and have been in remission since, and I never thought I would get were I am today, but this year I started on a education for cancer care and palliative care. I never thought I could reach this far.NEVER. It is a challenge, but I gonna try. I Want it so badly. But for me it took 8 years to get so far. I still have alot of fatigue and other sideeffects. But I have learned to live with them, but the sideeffects is not me...just something I have to carry with me....and then it is important to carry it in the right bag. I have been talking alot with a psyciatric nurse until 2 years ago, and that was very helpful for me. She understood me more than other. I wish you the very best. And I wish you the very best. It will not take you 8 years, if you get to know about Fatigue syndrome early. I didnt know about it so early, so it became very stressfull. Normally you cope with it easier. But this was me, and you are you 🙂 Just ask if you like. I am here if you like a new friend from Norway 🙂 Hugs
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