I have been feeling the same as you and thought I was alone. My husband of 44 years has malignant metastatic melanoma with no identified primary site. Many times he is short with me but I realize it is just the pain. He survived Prostrate cancer, Renal Cell carcinoma and bladder cancer 7 years ago. All seperate all within a 9 month period. Prognosis this time is not good. I can't bring myself to leave him. I wait for someone to visit so I can go to the store. I wake up several times in the nite to check and see if he is breathing. I can't bear seeing him fade away. How I keep up the front for everyone I don't know but I always smile and stay cheerful around him. This is one gift I can still give him. I will pray for you both.
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We are on the second chemo drug to try and buy my husband some time. He is having nose bleeds the day after chemo and low blood pressure. Today, after exercising at Cardiac Rehab for an hour they could only get his BP up to 86/52 which is the lowest it has been. I take his vitals twice a day and he has been running 90-94/50's. Is this common for the drug Abraxane? What can I look forward to as time grows shorter? He looks awful on paper but to see him he seems great other than being very thin.
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Cancer Council NSW would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land on which we live and work.We would also like to pay respect to elders past and present and extend that respect to all other Aboriginal people.