Hello @MyaK and welcome to the Online Community.
It sounds that you are experiencing an incredibly difficult situation, might I suggest that you call in to 13 11 20 and talk to one of our health professionals about this if you feel you cannot talk to anyone around you at home?
I would also encourage you to engage with others here. Everyone experiences grief in different ways and every experience is unique, but there are commonalities that others would share.
Kind Regards,
Kate - Online Community Manager
... View more