About Andrea44

Andrea44

Hello, I need to vent. I am experiencing extreme anxiety at the thought that I have to go back to work whilst desperately wanting to take care of my mother who has stage 4 cancer. I am trying to be so strong I front of her and all I want is to spend the time with her and it worry about financial pressure to keep the family afloat. My work has been extremely supportive and has allowed me to take time off through leave etc however the time has come to go back to work as I do not have any other choice but to keep an income coming in. I don't want to show any weakness in front of Mum as she is fighting this insidious disease with true resilience and strength. I worry if I said to her that I need to stay home that this will cause her further distress. Does anyone have any ideas how best to approach this? I am at a complete loss at to what to do.

Andrea44

Thanks Emily, I really appreciate your lovely note. It's a tough road that's for sure and so hard to navigate. I am so worried about Mum and to be honest (you sound so perceptive) I am struggling as well. 3 children working full time (I have taken time off which is a huge worry although a blessing as my workplace is so supportive and caring). It's hard to take time out. Thank you I am so thankful that there are people such as yourself that I can connect with at such a frightening and hopeless time. Andrea xx

Andrea44

Hi Alina, I am am very sorry to hear about your Mum. I too am struggling with what help I can provide my dearly loved Mum. She has stage 4 kidney cancer which has spread to her lungs, liver and lymph nodes - she is 70 years old. I just want yo to know your not alone please reach out if you would like to chat further. Andrea

Andrea44

Hello, this is is the first time that I have reached out in a public online forum. I have a number of questions and was hoping that I could get some advice and to connect with other people who are caring for loved ones with terminal stage 4 cancer. Firstly my mother was diagnosed with stage four kidney cancer in January 2017 which has spread to her liver, lungs and lymph nodes. She has been receiving wonderful treatment at Chris O'Briens Lifehouse. To cut a long story short I am starting to get very concerned about how the disease is affecting her. She is terribly fatigued, is having terrible episodes of diarrhoea and has lost her appetite and more alarmingly has depression and extreme anxiety. The only person she feels comfortable with is me. She also appears to get confused and has endless worry on routine things of life I really want to be able to assist her and calm her but I am not sure what I can do. I feel that she is deteriorating however no one really is giving any insights on time etc and I know this is causing more distress for her. Can anyone please provide any insights on what I should be doing for her. This is the first time that cancer has touched our family and I just want to make sure that I am doing everything possible for Mum. Thanking you, Andrea

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