Hi Gertie, I can try to imagine how stressful your situation is- such uncertainty must be horrible.  I don't really have any advice, as it sounds like you're already doing everything that can be done; I'm a list maker too, and making the flexible lists seems like a really good idea.  Is there any way you can express your anxiety to your husband's Nursing staff, and see if you can get any more information- even if it's just "he definitley won't be coming home in the next two days".    The only other thing I would say (as a 40 year old with an anxious mother)  is don't stres about looking after your children.  You did say they were adults, and you need to trust that they are capable of taking care of themselves- they may even be able to help you and your husband, if you let them.  You did the hard work of raising them, now is the time to allow that work to bear fruit.    Don't forget to take care of yourself, too. I know it's hard amongst everything else, but it's important that you remain in good condition too. sending love and hugs, Emily ... View more