Hi CATastrophe519, As well as being a member of this forum I'm also a member of a forum for women who's husbands have cancer, and this is a really common issue.  Unfortunately some people cope with bad situations by lashing out at the people that they love.  As far as a solution, only you can determine what is best for you and your relationship with your mother.  You've outlined a few different options, and you will know which one will create the best situation.   A lot of women do confront their husbands about their aggressive behaviour, but that is usually more imperative as they are living together, and sometimes there are kids involved.   You'll know what to do.   Another thing to keep in mind is your Mum's medication- there are some medications that change a person's mood and personality.  A good first step might be to ask your Mum's medical team if they think the medication may be affecting your Mum this way, that may give you some guidance about what to do next.  I wish you all good luck.   love and hugs, Emily ... View more