Thank you KateKat ☺️❤️🙏 ... View more

Thank you Rick, your kind wise words do help. I have always been one to help others. And since my diagnosis I have found that those I have helped the most over the years have almost been completely absent, as though now I need help they can not be available. And this has caused me some hurt. I live in a remote area so involvement as you have suggested with schools ect. is not so available. One thing that has been extremely confronting is that so many people, even those who I do not know terribly well keep coming to me every time anyone they know has cancer: I have been stopped in a local shop by a shop assistant and asked if a person they knew who was recently diagnosed could call me to talk about it. My GP says he thinks it is because I present as a capable person and because I keep my own suffering private to most. However I find it upsetting, to have people asking me to console and support others, even folk I do not know. And often cancer patients with much brighter outlooks than my own. I also have people wanting to tell me blow by blow accounts of someone they know or have known, who is dying or has died from cancer. As if they do not stop to consider what they are throwing at me is the reality of what I am going to experience; it is throwing salt on my wounds frankly. I live opposite a weekly market and now hide in my house on market day because I cannot cope with the way people get up in my face if I go there. It is as though folks fail to understand that I might like one day where I can go without the cancer being all present and centre of conversation. i am still in many ways dealing with the shock of my diagnosis and coming to terms with the new reality.  Maybe once the treatment routine slows down, ( in the last fortnight alone I had 9 medical appointments in one area or another), I will have enough space to come to better terms.   thank you again for your kind response. I wonder if anyone else has experienced things similar to what I have just detailed?   ... View more

Ok I just spent half an hour writing a blog and it has not saved the content🙀I am so tired I cannot bring ng myself to rewrite, sorry. I will try again some other time. I am new to this goidnight ... View more