Hi Claire19,   He has had a huge shock. One day he was fit and playing sport and the next he has cancer. Cancer means you are sick. His world has changed. He just wants to feel normal again. The problem is he needs to learn to adapt to a new normal. That's the tough part. When I was diagnosed with cancer I actually had planned to run an ultra marathon within the next 12 months. After discussing treatment options with my surgeon we both felt a total colectomy was the best option. Two days later and I'm starting to panic. If I have a total colectomy will I still be able to run that ultra? I started to think that perhaps the best option for me was to cancel the surgery?   That's not logical, but that is what was running through my mind. One day you're on top of the world and the next you have this awful sickness called cancer.   An observation I had was that has humans, we tend to define "who we are" by what we enjoy doing. I've found the key to helping me change was to concentrate on what I could do.   Perhaps your partner is angry but he is still trying to accept the changes. Maybe he is scared about what the cancer will mean for the future?   Perhaps you could ask one of his treatment team to discuss with him the benefits of seeing a therapist? Or see if he would attend a support group where he could discuss with others who have had to deal with similar issues?   -sch     ... View more