I’m a survivor now (thank God)  and I’m very grateful for my second chance at life. However, things that I never thought about before or during cancer are never far from my mind these days. It can be a lonely life for some I guess.   Sex (actual intercourse) is very painful for me now.  I don’t produce much, if any, estrogen these days so that just adds to the problem.  However, I still miss being in a relationship.  Very much in fact. I still crave intimacy and companionship (kissing, foreplay, cuddling, etc) but when actual intercourse is so painful- how do you find someone to build a relationship with?  It’s not like it’s an easy topic to bring up when “dating”.  Especially in this day and age when people are jumping into bed after just a date or two.   so, I’ve been single now for a decade. I’ve had some dates and even some “encounters” with an old “friend” but I want more.  I want a relationship and a life that I can build with someone.  I’m tired of the questions from people about why I don’t date. I’m tired of my mother worrying about me being alone for the rest of my life.  I’ve always been the one who never had to worry about not having a date for a special occasion.  I had a healthy sex and intimate life and have even been married before and engaged as well to another person after my marriage ended.   I’m young still (47) and the thought of living a life of solitude forever is not something I want to experience.  I have big dreams and try to find the positive in things just like I’m doing here.  At least I’m alive and I’m grateful for that.   There were many times I almost didn’t make it and the fact that I did is a miracle in and of itself.  So maybe I’ll find another miracle one day and not have to journey through this life single forever.  I have a lot of love to give and am not willing to give up just yet.       ... View more