About willow

willow

Hi Chemo is definetely the worst ......and it can take awhile to get over. The nausea disappears and the nasty taste in your mouth etc too but the tiredness and aches and pains can linger. I did the six and a half weeks of radiation and I must say - you need to look after yourself as it can be very tiring. I didn't get any nasty skin side affects - a bit of redness like mild sunburn and towards the end my nipple was peeling and very dry. I used the moisturiser they gave me every day and I'm sure that helped. I also bought the deodorant they suggested and only used that. It is a crystal deodorant. I was very tired especially in the last couple of weeks and strongly suggest you have a rest each day and don't take on too much if you don't feel like it as the exhaustion has a tendency to creep up on you. I would be in the shopping centre and suddenly just feel I had to lie down and couldn't go on. Don't forget that everyone is different - I know someone who worked right through and didn't feel too bad with radiation. So hopefully this will be how it is for you. I can promise you this though - it is 100% better than chemo. So, take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, and congratulations on the end of your chemo......it 'is' a good feeling...... Kind regards, Willow....xo

willow

Hi Thats' fantastic news......I hope now that you can start to live out your dreams.....Good luck too in March with the TAC settlement. Great to hear that finally you can relax and make plans..... It probably still feels a bit unreal for you and I can understand that it might be difficult re-adjusting.....but after all you've both been through I am sure you will cope and move on quite quickly. Good luck and take care ...really nice to hear some good news.... Willow xo

willow

Hi Jill Thinking of you and your boys....not a day passes when I don't wonder how you are and how you are coping.....it must be very difficult for you.....I remember my grief when I lost my twin sister 13 years ago ....my son then 11 years old sat and held my hand while I cried - he was so strong......he had a wealth of compassion and understanding that so many people years older don't have. These moments of sharing your deepest feelings strengthens the bond you have with them. Children are amazing and even though your boys are struggling I have faith that with your strength and love they will get through this and remember their Daddy with smiles on their faces. My love to you all, Willow xo

willow

Hi All of a sudden I am sooo angry with this 'cancer' and what it has done to my life.....and what it continues to do....I was so positive a few days ago and now I sit here with angry tears wondering why? I think I need to stop working as this too is making me angry and leaving me dissatisfied each day. Maybe it will be a mistake but right this second I don't want to go back. The people there make me angry and their issues about being fat, or bored or bitching about others etc makes me want to tell them to just get on with it and focus on the really important stuff. And I also feel a bit jealous that they don't have to be serious or anxious about things and can talk about what they are doing next year etc. I don't know what is wrong with me tonight - I am angry, scared, worried and quite miserable.......I just wish that I could go back twelve months (Feb 8th '09) to the night my daughter arrived at my door for a surprise visit from London (she had been there almost six years) and I said 'this is going to be the best year of my life' How wrong I was......... My love and best wishes to you all...... Willow xo

willow

Hi Pete I like your poem.....I wrote a couple of things in a note book when I was going through chemo as I felt I couldn't verbalise the way I was feeling - I have never shown anyone as it was kind of dark and dismal - but at the same time it gave me a way to express the pain I was feeling without having to share it with my family and friends - I felt they weren't able to deal with how I truly felt - and it turned out as time went on that I was right - they preferred to hear that I was coping and feeling better and dealing with my diagnosis. I like the way you have portrayed strength and hope amongst all the pain and negativity that this illness brings. Keep writing as I am sure it will bring you comfort. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feeling with us. Take care .....kind regards, Willow xo

willow

Hi Peter Welcome...! I was wondering why you are having your treatment in Melbourne? I too had - and still do have - a difficult time dealing with the emotional side of the cancer diagnosis and treatments. I don't know about you but initially there was that shock and panic to deal with and the fear. Then the treatment took off and that consumed my energy for a long time - I too had that feeling of isolation even though there was family around. I think this is a journey that is often a lonely one - that is why sites like this can help because you can talk to people that understand how you are feeling and know why you are feeling that way and want to help. In regard to your question on how to deal with the emotional side of cancer - this is also an individual thing. I didn't want to seek professional and put it off for a long time but since seeing a psychologist I have felt a bit better - at least I know there is someone I can go to and unload to about my true feelings and she will not judge me or critisize me. She also helps me to deal with my feelings. Honestly I can't say it is easy to work through the emotional side of this but I can say that it does get easier as time goes by....probably not something you can believe right now but it does. When I was having treatment I often rang the cancer help line (131120) as they are wonderful and were able to answer my many concerns and often helped me to regain a bit more perspective. Many times they were just there to listen. (it is very important to find someone you can talk to as you need to be able to talk about what you are experiencing) Take care ......and stay strong Kind regards, Willow

willow

Hi everyone I was wondering if any of you who have had breast radiation have experienced a lot of pain afterwards. I was ok during the treatment - I got a bit sore and a little bit red but overall it was a good reaction. I had my last treatment on Nov 2nd. Since then I have experienced a lot of tenderness from time to time. Lately though, especially the last couple of weeks, I have been really sore and tender. I also have what appears to be restricted movement in my arm - for example when reaching up for something from the cupboard or stretching my arm back to put on a cardigan. I just don't have the range of movement I used to have. Frankly I am a bit fed up with the aches and pains my body is still experiencing since stopping treatment. I read an old blog on the forum page recently about 'painful first steps when getting out of bed in the morning' - I have had this for months. Even if I have been sitting for some time when I get up my legs and feet really ache and I limp for awhile till I loosen up. I feel like an old women and I'm certainly not that yet. I want to do so much with my day too but my physical ability is not matching my mental desires. But after saying all that I would like to say that recently my daughter has been taking me out and about (tennis, movies, shopping, breakfast) and I have been enjoying myself and laughing a lot. It is my New Year resolution to not knock back any invitations. She has also booked a long weekend in Qld over the Labour day wk'end. This was a surprise - she just emailed me the booking details. So whatever else this year brings I am going to make sure I have some fun......hope you are all doing ok......stay strong and take care. All the best, Willow

willow

Hi Jill I can't imagine what that was like for you.....the need to protect our children at any age is a powerful emotion and you have just had to take away a little bit of their innocence. I cannot talk about my prognosis or fears with my grown children ...you are such a sensible and strong person. Reading this made me cry....it must be so hard for you to deal with. I hope you are getting as much rest as you can. The support of the Silver Chain people must be a blessing. Take care ....my love to you, your children and Greg. Willow xo xo xo

willow

Hi Jill I know how you feel being awake at 2am. It is a very lonely time. Just remember as everyone else has said 'we are here for you and you can tell us anything' I can't get over just how strong and focused you seem - though most of that is I imagine not how you really feel. When I speak to others I amaze myself with what I say sometimes (I speak as if I am accepting of my condition and have little or no fear and am ready for whatever lies ahead - so not true) and later think to myself 'why didn't I tell them how i really feel'. It is important for you to have a place where you can be honest,upset or angry/frustrated, sad or frightened, knowing that we understand you and want to help. I hope there are still times right now where you can smile and enjoy the moment. You do need to build some happy memories. I think a lot of your boys and am glad they have such a wonderful mother. You have definetely touched my heart Jill and I hope you will keep blogging as often as you feel like it. Even with your own problems you have found time to be there for others and that is a wonderful quality in a person. Stay strong, have faith and 'be kind to yourself' Love and hugs, Willow

willow

Hi larn How lovely ....new life.......congratulations to your sister. You said it was a surprise entry - was he early? If he was he was big for a premmie....... I love babies.....my neighbour recently had a little girl and I am going to a first birthday party tomorrow. Babies bring such joy and lots of smiles into our lives. Enjoy......Willow

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Radiation after affects?

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