Yesterday I had to view Ben's body for identification. He was so peaceful, and handsome it was refreshing, sad, but made me smile. Today is the funeral, I am attempting to say my own eulogy, not sure how I am going to go- but I at least have to try. It's still very sureal, but very peaceful. Others are more upset than I am, which sometimes makes it hard. I am a bit lost today- the kids are annoying me because the only way they know how to deal with this is by crying & having tantrums. I feel like I don't have the patience to deal with them so I walk away and hide alot. Allowing my parents to take control. They are sleeping over nan's for the first time tonight- it will be the first time in months that I have had an empty house. Back to reality on Sunday, both my parents are going home & it will be just me & the girls.
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So very sad to read your news. My thoughts are with you and your family at this time. Acknowledge any feelings you may experience, they are yours and they are real. Please take care of yourself now. Kerr
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