Hi Minidriver,
I was diagnosed with cervical cancer 3 years ago at the lovely young age of 31. Things do return to some kind of normal, it just takes time. There are are really difficult things your wife is dealing with right now, both emotionally and physically, it is difficult for you too, but giving her time to come to terms with what she is going through and understanding is really important. When some time has gone by and she is healing she will tell you when she is ready.
I hope that helps a bit. Its a touchy subject that most people dont want to talk about. The team looking after your wife will be able to help with any medical type questions you have & also the social workers are great. But I would say mostly just remember for the most part things can and do return to normal, just tell her you love her and offer her emotional support & the rest will follow in time. I had surgery, chemo and radiation and 2 kids to look after, that was exhausting, but I can tell you happily that things are just as great as they have always been but it took probably over a year for me to feel happy within myself again.
We have a group here on cc your wife might be interested in joining, here is the link.
http://www.cancerconnections.com.au/groups/gynaecological-cancer