Exwife diagnosed with cancer

[Livingwithhope]

I can relate to what your saying!🙂 My ex has got serious cancer too, and it feels like my goodwill to reach out and be supportive is only seen through his eyes of anger and resentment. It's almost like the anger is part of the condition. It's doubly sad, as I saw he was sick 8 months ago, and was unable to encourage him to see a doctor due to his anger about anything I said.

I'm glad you have manages to establish some mutual goodwill and connection with your whole family now ( according to your later posts). I'm still working on it!

[Exhusband021404]

My exwife passed away May 1st

it was hard, very hard

im coping and being strong for my kids

[Budgie]

I'm very sorry to hear that @Exhusband021404 .   You & your children have my deepest condolences. 

💙💐

Budgie

[Exhusband021404]

Thank you so much, me, the kids and family are still coping with loss my exwife.

The hard part is the kids have changed, different, and just doesn’t want to go to school.

It’s like their throwing away their moms hopes and dreams for them.

I’m just at a lost

[Budgie]

@Exhusband021404 , a parents death will change a child, especially if they're young.

Perhaps you could arrange some counselling for your kids.  It sounds like they need to get some coping mechanisms & to just unload all their pain.  I hope you all can find some peace soon.

Take care of yourself 

[Exhusband021404]

The kids just turned 17, few months ago. They are twins, boy & girl. 
And yes they have changed, sometimes I think it’s for the worse, but I’m giving them time.
They are still grieving the loss of their beloved mother. I will give them time, to process everything.

Finally they went to school today, and the school councillor made time to speak to my daughter. Hopefully it helped.

But we’ll see, time will tell

[Livingwithhope]

I'm so sorry to hear that! So sad for her, for you, for the kids. I'm sure she wanted to fight this disease so hard it made her constantly angry. As if being sick was a failing, a slur on her being able to be on top of things. That's how it seemed to be for my ex. He fought so hard, so uncomplainingly, stoically.  And he didn't want sympathy or help or support (other than the doctors and staff).

Sadly, he too has passed away yesterday, the 24th of May, in ICU, 6 days after surgery.💔💧

My tears are the worst for his stoic struggle, the hope and fear and suffering in his eyes, the relentless pain that he has so long endured. Like an animal caught in a trap no longer trying to escape, as that brings only more pain.  I felt for him so deeply.

I do appreciate and respect the doctors and staff for their warmth and help and support and expertise. But you have to wonder are we on the right track, in our approach using radio/chemo/surgery for cancer.

I watched him get tortured to death in order to have a chance to get better. Both by the disease and the treatment.

Medicine is constantly inventing new approaches and technology. Perhaps we need to declare chemo/radio/(with or without) surgery as unacceptable, to speed up the search for more holistic and benign methods🌞💔🧡

[Livingwithhope]

I just read your more recent post. It's hard on the site to let someone know which post you are replying it. I was offering my condolences for the passing of you exwife🧡

The kids will come good, it just takes time

[Exhusband021404]

My exwife didn’t stand a chance, all her vital organs was failing her. That is way, she has no treatment.

It saddens me thought that my kids are not the same anymore after she passed away.

it is my worry at the moment, the mental welfare of my kids.