Young widows with children

[beck2930]

Hi Ive been searching the internet for the past two nights looking for support groups for you young widows with children. Having no luck what so ever. Even tried good old facebook! I lost my partner in May 2011 and we have 3 children. We have done the councelling session and personally I got sick and tired of hearing "how does that make you feel". Bloody hell how do they think it makes me feel? I joined a oesphageal cancer forum on facebook and have made some very good friendships. They know how I feel. The downside is some/most of these people are overseas. It would sometimes be nice to meet up with people for social outings. Unless someone can point me in the right direction, I am thinking of making a group for widows with or without children in the newcastle/nsw area. I think it would be beneficial for us widows and our children to meet as we are all in the same situation and know how it feels to lose a loved one. Trips to the beach, park whatever. Does not need to cost alot of money! If anyone knows of such a group please let me know or if anyone is interested in such a group.

[beck2930]

I was worried no one has seen this but have seen there are 12 views! Is anyone interested? Chatting online is good but getting out of the house is beneficial also. I find at times we chat online and at times can bring each other down. This group Is about getting out there and doing positive things for ourselves and out children! It also helps that the group would have people that know how you feel and what the kids go through! For me I made a promise to my partner to try and live the rest of my life happy! I'm trying as I have never broke a promise to him and I'm not about to start!

[Mrs_Elton]

Hi Beck2930, I too am a widow with 2 young children, thanks to this insidious disease. There is a support group for widows with young children, it is based in Sydney and I believe they do social outings. I live in Perth, so I am only accessing it online. www.everafterwidowed.com I am sorry to hear of your loss, my husband passed in May 2010 after a primary of oesophageal cancer and a secondary tumour on the brain. My children were 6 & 8 when their Dad died. They have been amazingly resilient and have certainly been the reason that I have got out of bed on many a day over the last 2 years. Kind regards, Jill

[beck2930]

Hi Yeah I have been trying to access the forum on that website with no success. Im in the Newcastle area. Im hoping that there is something on there. Yes the kids have been my reason to get out of bed. Its been bloody hard and it still is, will be until I go. Miss him so much and so do the kids but like I said I made my man a promise I intend to keep it.

[Mrs_Elton]

Hi Beck, the Everafter site was being upgraded, but I believe that is complete now, so you should check it out again.

[beck2930]

yeah i had a look and still cannot get into the forum. I sent an email so fingers crossed

[Melanie]

I hope you find a group, you are absolutely correct- time to get out & do some socialising with people who understand, and aren't looking at you with pity. My dear hubbie is fighting a good fight with an astrocytoma brain tumor, and I completely agree- my 2 children aged 3 years & 6 months old are why I keep going everyday. Both of you give me hope that life after this cancer shit is ok!

[beck2930]

Ah bloody cancer! Yeah there is life after it all but mate its hard! Some friends drop by the wayside and Well u feel isolated! I've joined ever after widowed as well had 26 ppl Look at the post but no replies! I don't understand why!

[Von]

Hi, I am a different stage to you (my husband is still fighting his cancer, but has a terminal diagnosis) but I have asked the palliative care counsellor the same question about support groups for people in my situation & widows with young kids. I am 41 and have a 9 and a 7 year old. In my area there is nothing around. The counsellor said they've tried to set up a number of groups, but they just keep petering out after a year or so. I am in a 'regional city' and it is put down to the size of the population of widows with kids. There are other organisations around like "Parents without Partners" - it isn't quite what you are looking for, but it might help you get out of the house a bit more? I have a few friends who are single mothers and they have been good. One had cancer herself, so she 'gets it'. My divorced friends try to understand & be supportive of what I am going through, but in all honesty I don't expect anyone to 'get' this journey unless they've been down this road. I know I tried to support friends going through this before my husband's diagnosis - but, once you experience it personally you know that you really didn't fully understand. Even though my husband is still around I already feel the separation beginning - many more lonely nights while he is fatigued & sleeps early. Many more weekend outings on my own with the kids to let him rest. I know it is only a taste of things to come - but, it is a distressing window into my future. I am sure you understand where I am at. Hope you find what you are looking for, Von

[maddie86]

im a young widow but dont have any kids (dont know if thats good or bad) but i still feel the pain of not being with my husband 😞 i miss him so terribly and everyday is hard... especially with the christmas stuff coming up... xo