Hi Kasianne,
Thank you for replying. I don't even have the basics of what I am supposed to have - you mentioned an oncologist - no one has said anything about having an oncologist to me (should I ask this?). I have a Urologist that's planning everything and this is the second specialist I have swapped from after the last one being less than desirable. I'm really lost.
I honestly feel like I'm going mad. All of my family is in the gold coast and I keep getting messages from them saying "Don't forget, there's always someone worse", and my personal favorite was "Throw out all your sugar, you're feeding your cancer." So low and behold 3am last night I was throwing splenda out on my front lawn. I have no idea why I just put that into this message. I guess just to show how random I really am thinking..
The only thing I do know is that I am very young to have this and the specialist has only treated women over 40.
Is it normal to have such scattered thoughts? And I just can't stop shaking not to mention I can hardly get any sleep but I am so incredibly tired. Did you use any support networks here in Townsville? Is there some kind of center I can call or visit? I've heard that the oncology nurses up at the private hospital are really nice, one of my work colleagues is friends with them and gave me her number but I just don't know whether to call or not.
I certainly hope you are still in remission and your body is just playing tricks on you. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Was there anything you found or did that was helpful in the beginning that would be of some benefit?
I have to try and get half an hours sleep before getting ready for work but I will check back later this afternoon.
Kiri