Lost

[Ellah_S3]

Hello, Im Ellah. I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Endometrial Cancer in March, had my surgery on the 23rd of March where they took out my cervix, uterus, ovaries, fallopian tubes and lymph nodes. All have cancer. I just finished my 2nd round of chemo carboplatin and paclitaxel. Im alone, isolated, and the one person that has been my support, up and left. Too much. I look at myself in the mirror and i see a tired, bloated bald person who has been plucked, pulled, poked and stitched up together. Definitely dont feel like a woman. Discarded and not at all important. I have 4 more rounds to go then radiation. I have no idea how im going to have the strength to do those. 

How does anybody cope? 

[Jkhoo2022]

Hi Ellah
So sorry that you are going through this alone. I do not know what to say nor how to be of comfort to you. I just want to offer you friendship should you need someone to rant, share to help you get through this journey. I was there with my husband when he was first diagnosed till it was time for him to leave. Be gentle with yourself, you are worthy and don't let anyone else make you feel otherwise. Joy

[Merel88]

Hi Ellah_S3

😔 I can relate! (Sadly)

I was diagnosed in April with metaplastic triple negative breast cancer.  I’ve had 4 rounds of AC chemo (horrible) and now on 12 weekly rounds of Taxol.
I’m alone too and have been alone for years. 
it was hard to ask for support and I still do everything I can myself, but I am starting to sink into despair.

the reflection in the mirror you describe is also me: bloated, bald, and be-scarred.  I get a shock when I see myself.  I never realised that Peter Dutton was missing his eyebrows and eyelashes as well as hair until I started to look like his sister!  
Alone, discarded, not at all important - that also sums up my feelings.  
i went to a Look Good Feel Better day with Cancer Council, but it only made me feel lonelier as everyone there had partners and. children.

I think people on their own have different issues.  I wish there was a support group for single people!!! Somewhere to be open about these feelings without fear of being misunderstood.  Maybe set up a mutual help group…

Anyway, I mainly just wanted to say I get it.  You’re not alone with these feelings.  
I wish you brighter and happier days ahead, days where you don’t feel so alone….

thanks for being so open and honest.  It helped ne not feel so alone too!!