Hey Nikki
There's power in you. There's fire. We all have it to different degrees, but we don't all have the ability to find it and use it. We're all capable of sudden and dramatic changes in direction.
Only you can find your inner strength .. the kids are probably a double edged sword .. on the one hand they're your reason .. and on the other hand the idea of passing away and them being stuck alone with the grief is overwhelming. (I'm in the same boat).
You have to fight.
My father in law has a similar cancer, in his lungs, colon, pancreas too I think .. really advanced .. stage 4 .. they gave him weeks, maybe 2 months to live (this was like 9 months ago now). He got on a clinical trial which uses targetted immunology to supercharge his body's immuno defences to engage the cancer.
The theory is good - we are, all the time, fighting cancer and other toxins .. a healthy immune system does a better job at preventing the disease. A *super* immune system .. well, who knows ?
Anyway, just a couple of weeks ago, they declared that the cancer in his body had shrunk about 80% and was in remission. So from weeks to live .. to ... an open question.
The longer you can survive, the better medical science will get .. but make sure you challenge the clinicians. If your primary doctor is a radiation oncologist, ask for advice or referrals on immunology, ask about clinical trials, push, beg, plead, cajole.
You're just a patient to them, really, one in thousands. They have to remain clinically detached - so there might be crucial little pieces of advice that you don't get, unless you push.
Worth thinking about ?
