Hi Alison. I have been reading your posts since you started here. I too lost my beautiful dad to cancer 19 months ago. My dad was my best friend and my rock in life. He was only one I could talk to when I had a problem. Everyone else could see he didn't have much time left but not ME. I was in total denisl and was even making plans for him to come and live with me. I was shattered when he went and even 19mths on I still cry at the drop of a hat. The only thing that gets me through now is all the beautiful, warm, funny memories I have of our times together and even though he is not here no one can ever take those memories away. I chat with him every day and I can "feel" he is around me. And when I do lose it and cry I just have to relive those memories and then find myself laughing with him. But I would give ANYTHING just to give him one more hug and tell him I love him but he knew that even at the end. So with my experience the hurt never goes away but it can feel better thinking of all those great wonderful and fun times you had with your dad. Take care. Chris ... View more

Hi Alison. I have been reading your posts since you started here. I too lost my beautiful dad to cancer 19 months ago. My dad was my best friend and my rock in life. He was only one I could talk to when I had a problem. Everyone else could see he didn't have much time left but not ME. I was in total denisl and was even making plans for him to come and live with me. I was shattered when he went and even 19mths on I still cry at the drop of a hat. The only thing that gets me through now is all the beautiful, warm, funny memories I have of our times together and even though he is not here no one can ever take those memories away. I chat with him every day and I can "feel" he is around me. And when I do lose it and cry I just have to relive those memories and then find myself laughing with him. But I would give ANYTHING just to give him one more hug and tell him I love him but he knew that even at the end. So with my experience the hurt never goes away but it can feel better thinking of all those great wonderful and fun times you had with your dad. Take care. Chris ... View more

Hi Alison. I have been reading your posts since you started here. I too lost my beautiful dad to cancer 19 months ago. My dad was my best friend and my rock in life. He was only one I could talk to when I had a problem. Everyone else could see he didn't have much time left but not ME. I was in total denisl and was even making plans for him to come and live with me. I was shattered when he went and even 19mths on I still cry at the drop of a hat. The only thing that gets me through now is all the beautiful, warm, funny memories I have of our times together and even though he is not here no one can ever take those memories away. I chat with him every day and I can "feel" he is around me. And when I do lose it and cry I just have to relive those memories and then find myself laughing with him. But I would give ANYTHING just to give him one more hug and tell him I love him but he knew that even at the end. So with my experience the hurt never goes away but it can feel better thinking of all those great wonderful and fun times you had with your dad. Take care. Chris ... View more

Hi. I can really feel for you at this time. My dear dad who was my rock and best friend was diagonised in 2008 and I could never accept that he was ill. He was the one who supported me and got me through hard times as he knew I was in denial. He passed in Sept 2010 and I still miss him very very much. My advice to you is to always be there for him, always let him know how much you love him and make all the times you spend together as normal. Up until the end dad and I joked and laughed like we always did and I know that made him happy. It is so hard but please look after yourself as well as your dad as that is what he would want for you. Take care Chris ... View more

Hi Alison. I have been following your comments and have always felt that our stories were SO similar. I lost my beautiful dad-also my rock and my best friend- 17 months ago. I know what you are going through. Please feel free to message me if you want to talk. Much love and please take care of yourself. Chris ... View more

Hi Alison. I have been following your comments and have always felt that our stories were SO similar. I lost my beautiful dad-also my rock and my best friend- 17 months ago. I know what you are going through. Please feel free to message me if you want to talk. Much love and please take care of yourself. Chris ... View more

Hi Alison. I have been following your comments and have always felt that our stories were SO similar. I lost my beautiful dad-also my rock and my best friend- 17 months ago. I know what you are going through. Please feel free to message me if you want to talk. Much love and please take care of yourself. Chris ... View more

Hi Vicki thanks for that. Sometimes I feel that I am not "normal" in that I still feel him around me every day and I always talk to him but mostly at 11.12am on a Thursday(the day he passed) i really feel the need to chat to him and be close to him but others say that is not normal. They say I should make this Xmas special but I just can't do that. Of course I will be there for my grandkids and make it special for them but dad will always be on my mind especially as my kids are arguing and I will have a "divided Xmas" but as some have said as long as I see both kids and their families I am lucky. Why do I feel so unlucky!!! This Xmas I really thought we would be all together but not to be. I know dad would have wanted different but he would have said "Chrissy just thank God you have your family" and even though he was a big part of that family I do feel lucky that I feel him around me every minute of every day. Love you so much dad ... View more

Hi Vicki thanks for your kind words. I know dad has gone but I just think I will see him again and I have never felt pain like this. My dad was my best friend who was always there for me and I really don't know how to go on without him. I know he would not like to see me so sad but I just don't know where to go from here as I miss him so so much. ... View more

Hi Mands. My dad had 2 types of cancer and he also was a very strong and independent man who lived alone despite being legally blind and I was always begging him to move in with me but he always wanted his independence and in the end he was not allowed to stay at his home but sadly he passed away in hospital. You are so lucky to have your dad living with you and please cherish every moment with him. I was with with my dad for 24hrs before he passed and that meant so much to me but I wish I could have had him living with me before he passed. Take care Chris ... View more