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maddie86
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July 2010
November 2016
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August 2010
hey i just read ur blog.. i feel exactly the same way. Not knowing things is really horrible. I try to be posative as much as possible, but there are times when i break down completly.. stay strong!
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August 2010
that frustrates me when i hear about work places being unsympathetic! my boss said to my face if u need time off have it.. then behind my back complained that i wasnt capable of supervising children because my mind is elsewhere and im taking to much time off... really annoys me!
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August 2010
thats horrible! they did the same thing to my bf, cut his benefits the scumbags! centerlink are all about money and not the people... its hard.. u need to be happy and cheery for your job.. i work with children also so i know how u feel! things will get better, they have to, and you watch people will come from everywhere to support you guys. I had the worst day possible yesterday felt really crap, but i can honestly tell you today i feel much happier... those days come and go where u feel like running away or just staying in bed, but it does get better! my thoughts are with you, dont worry about stupid centerlink!
:) xo
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August 2010
im glad things are looking up for you 🙂 well done! as for your friends they probably didnt knw what to say to you etc.. my bf has cancer and im finding the same thing..i thought my friends would be there for me, and their not 😞 i guess you just have to try and not worry about other people, just more yourself 🙂
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August 2010
thanks 🙂 yeah that medicare stuff is just awful 😞 but i guess the docs are just ticking it because they want you to get as many benefits as possible.. it is true cancer is totally like the weather.. even with myself i have my days were im as happy as larry, the next day im just bawling my eyes out.. going to work in the morning is horrible! thats when i feel my worst.. at night when im lying next to him i cry silently sometimes, thinking why you? but i guess there's no time for that and we can only hope :)
xo
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August 2010
cancer can be humerous! we were at the oncologists the other day and my bfs doc said 'i'l be right back my pen just died' we giggled at the irony of it... its a long process.. the internet can be a bit scary as some of it is just writen by people who dont really knw much... i advice to stay away from it, unless looking up posative information like survival stories etc!
xo
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August 2010
i know how u feel! the waiting game is awful.. but there's nothing you can do.. my bf has his good days and bad days, and ur right when the bad days are bad, they are horrid! my bf gets so moody and angry and just blank.. pain management is good because it means healing faster to.. i massage my partner often, this helps hims sleep and with the pain. I also think that you should be upfront and honest with your kids.. i work with children and they often are very cluey about things. Best of luck! xoxo
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August 2010
so i just thought id write this as another way to vent. Went to oncologist with my bf before chemo weds, he made him sign a form for medicare benefits ticking the 24 months or less box. He said 'i dont know what will happen but your cancer is agressive so we tick this box for now'. It made me feel so upset... i sat with him at chemo thinking and getting upset. I hate not knowing what might happen to him.. makes me feel sick. He's quite posative and in the right mind frame but its scary.. i cried myself to sleep beside him when he was asleep. Thinking of hish funeral- if it gets to that what will i be like? how am i supposed to cope? im only 23 how am i supposed to deal with this? he's the love of my life i dont know how to cope 😞
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August 2010
this must be so hard for you, but its equally as hard as those who love you... your family is in pain because its natural.. dont be afraid of that.. they love you and seeing you like this knowing theres nothing they can do is the worst thing ever.. i know the feeling.. just try and think of how loved you are.. 🙂
thoughts are with you xo
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August 2010
thanks guys.. it does help to know other people have been and survived what ive been thru... its just shit. theres no other word for it!
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