I do know of spouses both having cancer but not having the same cancer and not always at the same time . You are both in a position to really understand each other . You both appear to be strong and positive . ... View more

If your wife is worried that she may not make it to Christmas she is not totlly unaware of the situation . Maybe you can celebrate Christmas in July. It is something that is done in some places anyway.Then if she is still here for Christmas you can have a different kind of Christmas celebration . Then ,since you've moved your Christmas ,suggest that you move your holiday forward a month or few . Just an idea . ... View more

Perhaps your parents thought it was easier for them to go to you than have you and your family travel to New Zealand . It is good that they feel your dad is well enough to do this . ... View more

I suspected that I may have cancer in September 2009 because of symptoms . In hindsight I had other symptoms a year before that . I went to my gp in October ,had a ct scan which said polyps .Saw an ENT in February ,1010 ,who said it was not cancer but he removed it a few days later and a couple of days later told me it was cancer. I was also told that it was probably there for 2 to 3 years . I now take my date from when I was told it was cancer . I suppose it doesn't matter which date we choose as it's all approximate . As for remission none of my doctors have used that term with me . I sometimes use it . To me it means that there's no sign of cancer now but it will return . I 've been told by my oncologist that it most probably will, eventually . ... View more

I can't say anything to comfort you but it's obvious you are doing all you can for your dad . ... View more

I believe that stress could perhaps be like the final straw . I think there would be at least a few more factors to allow cancer to get to a point that it's detectable . I think many have the cancer there in their bodies but the immune system keeps it from taking over .Then sometimes the immune system can no longer win . ... View more

I think we all wish that we could get away from all this stuff and just return to life the way it was before cancer came into our lives . Sadly it doesn't happen . Take one day at a time and express any emotions that you need to ,especially here. ... View more

It looks as though your father is very sick having septicemia as well as cancer . Do what you can and want to do . It cannot be easy for any of your family . ... View more

What a great attitude you have under such horrible circumstances .I sure hope you continue to deal with your chemo and not get any sicker and I hope the pain lessens. I will keep you in my thoughts . ... View more