Hi, jane marie, As a person who has gone through this journey, it is not too sounding good, how this happens, nobody knows My lovely wife of 40 yrs was dx with the secondaries in her liver and they were inoperable. Keep supporting your mother in law and tell her how much you love her, even when she is sick she will acknowledge that you are there for her. Do what you can for her god bless wombat4 ... View more

An incredible journey Lioness, for you and your husband, you are both made of tough stuff. There are no words that can describe adequately what you are going through.The support from tafe and the soccer club in assisting you both must have helped, good on them for their involvement. I know from personal exp once the darkness descends it is not an easy battle, my wife was dx with colorectal cancer and secondaries in her liver, we never lost sight of the the light at the end of the long tunnel and always supported each other, we did everything we needed to do. Keep focussing on the end of the tunnel and although your lives have significantly changed you still have each other and lots of support. wombat4 ... View more

Its not good Brooke that you are waiting so long to start treatment. It just increases the anxiety. I sincerely hope it works out well for you. wombat4 ... View more

Your dad could not have wished for a more supportive ,loving daughter, take some comfort in the fact that you did everything possible for him wombat4 ... View more

Thats good Brooke. Stay positive and strong. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people that you have never met about these`things, sometimes we feel guilty about heaping so much emotional pain on our loved ones. Keep blogging. Its good to talk about it wombat4 ... View more

Hi Tim, Try not to take on too much, plan your day around the lack of energy you are feeling, and keep the more involved tasks for when the treatment is leaving your system. Think of the folfox as a good thing that is reducing lesion size. My wife would have the chemo every 2 weeks, on monday, and feel tired for a few days and then have more energy from about thursday. So out of the fortnightly cycles, three quarters of the time she felt she could get on with things. Good luck wombat4 ... View more

Hi Brooke, My wife and I were told exactly that in feb 2010 when my wife was dx with bowel cancer primary, and secondaries in her liver,it was inoperable in her liver because it was so close to the main arteries, we were on palliative care straight away. So the primary was removed, or most of and it was chemo for the secondaries, the best we could hope for was stable. How we ended up like that, god only knows and he is not letting on, nobody deserves these insidious diseases, but we get them. Hang in there Brooke, it is a shock, our world went from one of colour to one of grey in the space of minutes.. Do the scans, blood tests and chemo, try meditation, learn of the side effects of chemo and do what you can to lessen them. The people on this site are not in a good place, that is why we are here, we support each other with practical advice and emotional support. Send in your blogs, it helps to talk about it, we know the place you are in, we are there with you, as sufferers, or carers to our loved ones. wombat4 ... View more

Hi Jasbach. Anxiety and panic attacks can be are very real and distressing for the person involved and those around them. You probably made the right choice in not going to hospital. Try not to take on tasks that are going to stress you, if the rubbish dosnt get put out this week, it can wait till next week. Recognise triggers and stressors that may set off these attacks and try to avoid them. When you come home from chemo have a interesting DVD ready or a book to involve yourself in and try to have some quiet time, try not to focus too much on what is happening in your life at the moment, be kind to yourself, do not take on too much. Know where your anxiety medication is, make notes of where you put these things that are important to you, like your back support Keep going to the psych, and put in place the tools she is giving you to work with this. The less stress you feel, the stronger you will be to fight and overcome the illness. I notice that you say the anxiety has settled in for good, well no it hasnt, it is an extra hurdle that you do not need, but with the right tools you will overcome it. wombat4 ... View more

Hi sebastian, My wife would get neuropathy in her fingers and she did say once she felt the top of her legs felt slightly different, all to do with nerve damage, but I would suggest ask the treating oncologist. wombat4 ... View more

Dear Sunshine006au, It looks as if the end may be close for your dad, as the nurses said, it would be unfair on him to keep him going just for goings sake. Yuor dad understands what is happening. You have been a wonderful support for him and he could not have asked for any better. you will go through your grief and time is a sedative, you will never forget your dad, but as time passes it will not be so painfull for you. When I was young I was out playing with my friend, I fell into a deep pond that was covered in ice, and as I tried to support myself by grabbing the ice, the deeper in the water I got, I could not swim, I was screaming and terrified, all of a sudden my vision was from behind my friends shoulder who was standing on the bank, and I was looking at this terrified little boy in the water, and I felt I was in a wonderful place and felt a peace and calmness that I have never felt before or since, and that was over 50yrs ago,If someone had given me the choice at that point to go back into the water to carry on with my life, or to stay where I was, I would have chosen to stay where I was, but my friend had grabbed a branch and held it out to me, and as soon as I touched it I was back in the water again screaming and terrified. What I am saying is that you dad is probably in the peaceful calm place, and if given the choice ? My lovely wife of 40yrs suffering from her terminal cancer, just before christmas was put on morphine and I held her hand, stroked her hair and after a few hours she went to sleep, and I knew she was in that wonderful place. Be strong for your dad wombat4 ... View more