Hey Sailor Thanks for the heads up, now am going to the big smoke i will see if it is coming there and hopefully not booked out. Julie ... View more

Congratulations sailor!!!! Thats wonderful news and sounds like you celebrated i a wonderful way too. What did you see at the theatre? Julie ... View more

Hiya Ruby, I used to get that with my last cancer. It is life changing to be diagnosed with cancer and as you say not always in a good way. People simmply dont like to face that and it is akin to an intial diagnosis when people cant talk to the person diagnosed. It is like it is too much for them to deal with and yet we are the ones dealing? Often it is the cancer patient who has to be the strongest and the most forgiving/understanding at times too. ... View more

I do also get niggly with people at times, the ones that are not comfy around us. I remember the first time i was diagnosed with cancer i actually had someone cross the road so they didnt have to speak to me. At the time i was devastated but now i realise that we lose some friendships and yet others are gained and some are more enahanced because of it. I try and focus on the enhanced and new friendships although i did lose a childhood friend last time and that took some coming to terms with. It is for me about drawing a line in the sand ... my stuff ________________ your stuff and you need to deal with it. Most times that helps me. That must be tough having tests every four weeks, well i know it is tough as last time i had to be checked weekly to begin with and then it moved out to longer. Sometimes i just "sucks" that our choices have been taken away and we are left with ones we dont particulary want. Sometimes we just need to be negative and wallow for a bit. Sometimes we dont need to be brave or strong. All of those feelings are ok to feel and i hate it when people wont allow us to feel them. The disclaimer here is "dont stay there". ... View more

Yes it does make me mad and its frustrating also. Why do people want to deny us the normal emotions that we go through? I dont understand why they wont allow us to feel and to address these emotions. I really do have a huge soap box on this one and when i give my talk to the local rotary club it is one of the things that i will be touching on. I feel for you and if you ever need a shoulder to vent on, feel free. :) ... View more

Thanks Caro i will take a looksee at your website. ... View more

Hiya Caro No the light isnt there just yet. Mainly because i know what i am facing as things go further down the track and i am focussing on dealing with those if and when they happen. Radiotherapy for head and neck cancers is pretty invasive and has quite a few horrid side effects. I find myself knowing these things and yet i am still signing up for this gig. To me its quite bizarre in some ways as i know i am going to be in lots of pain and end up back on peg feeds, i know i will lose weight, i know my mouth will have ulcers and my tongue will be swollen along with a sore throat. However, thats my gig and do it and face it i will. Unfortunately, with radiotherapy the side effects seem to last a little bit longer after you finish. :) I can do this and yet this time i am break things down. ie I take each day at a time and deal with one thing at a time. If its not the day to deal with something then i dont. That helps to keep me sane and also maintains my energy levels somewhat and it also helps my emotional side to cope. I found the system more disempowering today than it was 21 years ago. Although perhaps the cancer i have this time has impacted on that. These are the things i would love to see being addressed by the medical fraternity and changes made. It wont take much on their behalf and other than educating those who work in the "system" i cant see it costing a whole lot of money and yet it would make such a huge change to patients and ultimately possibly impact on their survival rate. Most importantly it would help for them to have a more empowered journey and easier one. I am fortunate, i have a huge network of friends and family who have supported me. I am eternally grateful for this support. I have one friend who drove twice a week to see me in hospital and that entailed an approx 400km round trip. Amazing!!! I am just chuckling to myself here as this morning i seem to be finding all sorts of soap boxes to get on. Sorry everyone for taking up so much space! Julie ... View more

Hi Caro Thank you again re the more power to me. 🙂 It is about getting our personal power back. We lose so much personal power when we are in the system. I am human and there have been times when i have cried and felt down about things, however, in the end its up to us to dust ourselves off and get in there and get on with life as it is. This time having cancer is different and in some ways its easier and in others (treatment) it is way more difficult. My radiotherapy begins next week along with cetuximab and that will run for 7 weeks. The side effects from the radiotherapy are not nice, however, its going to help eradicate this thing for good. So thats the focus after addressing the bad bits. :) Julie ... View more

ooops i got on my soapbox and forgot to tell you that i have had chemotherapy and am about to start radiotherapy and the latter is not thrilling me at all. ... View more