I join this group thinking they would be more about partner (married for 40yrs) having problem to cope. Being new maybe i havent found the post. My husband is a "tuffy". Stiff upper lip. He told our daughter he was fine and was coping. He will be there for support and caring. He has been there for support in a way: drive me to chemo, visit in hospital for 20 minutes, pay for what have to be paid, new aircon during the summer, go to chemists but when it comes to my domain he won't or can't do. i told him ex. buy firm green grapes, came back with grapes full of yellow drooping fruits; can you please buy this brand of pasta sauce, comes back with no brand jar.  I laugh at time that i didn't train him well enough when the kids were growing and before i got sick ( pancreatic cancer). There is no acknowledgement of my illness, my fear. Will not listen to my suggestions for meal, cleaning house or stocking the frig,etc... I can do it he says but does it ALL his way. I am split between him being there and him bringing me closer to tears and frustrations. I do not have the energy to cope with this. Is this trivia, a concern, a way of hiding his very guarded feelings. Please give feedback. ... View more