Smiler Our approach since we met each other (some two decades ago) has always been - lay it out as openly and realistically as possible no matter what the topic is. Since she has been diagnosed we have discussed all of the possibilities including the worst case scenario. The worst case scenario was discussed in a great detail. We have discussed also what will be our back up plan knowing well what the law re: euthanasia is. The darkest hour lasted for about a week. During this period we have expressed any feelings we felt with no reservations towards how it may be perceived by the other one. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn't, for one, accept the Whipple's procedure, and two, no chemo for me thanks. My motto is - whatever happens happens. We are in the process of evolution and we have done it for tens of thousands of years. Only in recent times we value life more than ever before. We try to preserve it at all cost by using everything we have at our disposal. Therefore the human evolution has considerably slowed down (due to drugs and medical treatments) or even stalled. Although, we may be living longer and better my personal view is that the fittest are not the only ones surviving anymore but with them many others who are not as "fit". If I am one of those (thinking out loud) so be it. It is important to appreciate life as it comes. We have only one shot at it so it is important not to stress over anything but embrace life and live it to the fullest. So, yeah, discussions are welcome, venting is useful whenever it is needed. Keeping an open mind and taking one day as we go is what we do. We have completely put aside issues like; job, money, houses, friends, relatives, who gets what and how much etc. and we care about ourselves only. The only thing we do not have enough of is life itself, therefore we treasure it, and celebrate it daily. Cheers. ... View more

Hi Smiler Thanks for the info. I have been closely reading your posts. To answer your question I must say that both of us, my partner and myself, are very resilient individuals who really do not care what others may have to say or think. We do not share much of private stuff with our relatives or friends. Our business is our business only. If we feel like sharing some info we share what we think is appropriate. She does not have anything to prove to anyone so in whole honesty we never put it the way you've described it. I am keeping a close eye on everything new re; PC. Even today there is some more news about a diff. chemo treatment; http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/225130.php We will discuss it with her doctor the next time we go to see him, and only if it is a worthwhile solution she may consider it. Apart from that, she is in a pretty good shape ATM. Just before the surgery she was 57kg. Today she was very close to it. (56.5kg) She is pain free and getting stronger. Fatigue is still an issue but if it is all she needs to manage in the future she may consider herself very very lucky. Overall, she is religiously keeping taps on her diet, exercise and rest....and stress levels. That's pretty much it. At this stage we have no complaints however we have our fingers crossed :) I hope you too recover well after you complete your treatment...fingers crossed for you too. P.S. (She felt a bit down the other day because a person she shared her hospital room with died. She did not die from cancer itself but from pneumonia which was the chemo side effect. I am glad she has decided to stop with the chemo.) ... View more