I guess I was in a similar situation. In Jul/Aug'11, my partner of 10 years was diagnosed with GBM and passed away in Sep'12. I'm a loner and private person. At the time, none of my friends and family knew that I had a partner. I didn't have any close friend when I had to deal with this. I was pretty much on my own. My partner knew about this so we made it clear right from the start that we would be opened and honest to each other, expressed our fear, and shared our thoughts. He understood we were in this battle together, not just himself. Fortunately, my manager at work was also extremely helpful and understanding. He worked in a different office but regularly called me to discuss work and to see how I was in general. I think it's important to have someone to talk to. I talked to people on this forum and a couple other cancer forums. I created a blog on this site as a way to let go of my feelings and any frustrations I had which I found very helpful. As for feeling that you will be on your own after all this, I believe you will find a way. Someone gave me a very good suggestion at my partner's funeral - say 'Yes' to any invitations! Be open-minded and reach out to people you know, any friends you have. It doesn't matter how distant you are to these people. You never know what will happen next. A loner such as myself, somehow, found a way to connect with a couple of girls from university who migrated to Australia like me. We studied at the same department but were never really friends. Now I'm happy to say they are my friends and one of them has become my best friend actually. There's always a bright side of life 🙂 ... View more

Hi Deni, Thanks for your message. It's been a very long time since I was on this site last. I was about to close my account due to spam. Anyway, I'm doing well, I think. In the last 12 months, I travelled in England, France, and Italy for 3 months. I cleared my house and got rid of my partner's belongings. It was hard at the start but had gotten easier with time. He was quite a hoarder so I ended up feeling angry with so many weekends spent sorting his stuff and so many trips to the tip and op-shop LOL A friend helped me prepared my house for sale while I was overseas and it was sold a week after I came back. Then, I was busy packing and moving house. I can't say I downsized but I have moved to an area where I always want to live in a secure block of apartments. I'm now settling into my new place, new area, new lifestyle ... on my own but feel nice!! I get to do things I want to do, no consulting with anyone, no compromise 🙂 I still wish I could share the last 12 months of my life with my partner even though there are many things I did that he might not like it. Oh well... that's not going to happen so I just have to enjoy my life. Take care ... View more

Avastin works for some people and not for some. My late partner was in the last group. ... View more

mmm never heard of this but anything is possible, I guess. Try doing some exercise and keep yourself busy. My problem is sleep and appetite. For some reasons I don't have good long sleep like in the past and no appetite. I've lost 6 kgs in the last 2 months due to not eating much and exercise to help me sleep. ... View more

I am so sorry there is so much pain here and I don't know how I can help anyone. I wish there is something I could do to help. ... View more

I know what you mean. In a way I feel so blessed that my partner was with me until the day before he died. Who would have thought a man who nodded in agreement and all smiley when his mate asked whether he was going to watch the grand final game the next day would take his last breathe 18 hours later? But then I also wish to have more time with him. Big Hug for you Jan. ... View more

I hear you and understand what you are going through. It is sad that there will come a time when the least we could do is letting someone we love go. ... View more

You should speak up and tell your husband that you don't appreciate him yelling at you. You are going through this cancer journey as well and you are suffered just like him even though the experience and feeling are not the same. I know it is easy for me to say than for you to do but every now and then you have to remind him of this. I was the same as you being scared of waking up to find my partner lying dead next to me. Well, it didn't happen that way for me. Please take one day at a time and stay positive. ... View more

Hi Jan, your husband sounds like my partner in a way. When he was with other people, I think he pushed himself a bit more to be the best as he possible could push himself to be. I think you need to have a good talk to your husband of your need for a break. I'm sure he would understand even though he might not be happy and it's something you have to push for to keep you sane and be able to keep going. I heard about one girl who has GBM and the doctor told her family that she has only a couple of weeks but she's still here after 2 months. My partner was told he would have 3-6 months and he ended up having only 2 weeks. A day before he passed away, we were making a plan with his doctor to take him home from inpatient palliative care unit and the doctor told us that we talked about weeks or months here but then the next day he's gone. I guess you can't tell. ... View more