thank you for your encouraging words. thankfully he has decided to get support and I offered to go with him to a group. Your right men do find it particularly hard and his son, they lost the nurturer in their family and they long for that connection to soothe their heartache. ... View more

Thanks for the greetings. I've since found out a little more info after the CT and MRI. I will have a colonography the day after tomorrow as the CT images weren't very clear. At this stage the cancer is confined to the lower rectum and is in a few of the nodes. I'm scheduled for surgery on the 25th and will be having a lower rectal resection. I've been doing a lot of reading and a lot of talking to others who have been in a similar position. Had a counseling session and I am doing ok. Just starting to get a little nervey about the surgery as the date gets closer. ... View more

Im not sure what you can do, i lost my mum when i was 13 and we lived in a remote area, i found that people just ringing to show they care and ask how you are is enough when you are a long distance away. Just dont forget about your friend in six months time, at the beginning when the loss is new everyone seems to rally around and try to be there for the person etc and then they think they are doing ok and people dont mean to but everyone seems to get on with life and its happenings and thats when the person is probably needing you the most when everything has settled down. Maybe invite him to you for a little break away or offer to go and stay if you think thats what he needs and you are able to? I hope you are coping ok with the loss aswell. All the very best Stace ... View more