It's very hard to navigate your way around this site when you're all fuzzied up from chemo! The Cisplatin is reeking hell with my poor ears but luckily enough the nausea has disappeared today! I am so grateful for my Mum at this time, she's helping with EVERYTHING I can't do...which is pretty much everything!! I've only had one round of chemo and this op on top of it...so I'm sure not every round will have me feeling like this! Anyway, fatigue...has settled in... ... View more

I've been at the royal melbourne hospital since 8.30am, it was a long day indeed. It had to be that way however cos it was my first day of a new round and I had a new chemo drug to be introduced to - it's called Cisplatin and it hasn't really changed since they started using chemo to treat cancer. It's some nasty stuff and I'm not feeling too good, right now. What bothers me the most isn't the nausea or the fatigue, it's the fact that I can't use my brain the same way I did yesterday. I'm a writer and the fact that after chemo I can't find the word I want to use (and NO tapping on my head doesn't work.) I can't spell like I used to and I can't seem to stick to the point. The WONDERFUL nurses on the day ward today told me it was commonly referred to as 'Chemo Brain.' Now what really matters about today is the nurses. No matter how much trouble I have with doctors treating me like a number or treating me with prejudice I NEVER experience this with the nursing staff. They are ALWAYS friendly, reassuring, kind, factual and they come back when they say they will WITH the information they said they'd get.. They work so hard and give you that little bit extra when you know they are tired and want to get home - so thanks to the nurses...You make a horrid situation a little easier to bare... Good luck to anyone in treatment at the moment... Brooke. ... View more

Today I spoke to my doctor... she can't get me into surgery for them to put in my 'port' until the 20th of February. I was diagnosed with the secondary cancer almost a month ago, it's in my lungs, my chest, my abdomen. I still can't believe I have to wait so long for everything. You'd think once they'd made a cancer diagnosis being quick would be their first priority..but no, I've never experienced such long waiting times in my life. The doctor even said sorry to me and told me that she would've liked my treatment to start a lot sooner... It makes no sense to me. Not much makes sense anymore. ... View more

Three weeks ago I was diagnosed with secondary cancer. My first cancer was a squamous cell bowel cancer but now there is a tumour in my lung and about seven lymph nodes. Early last week I was introduced to yet another doctor who told me they couldn't 'cure' my cancer they could only reduce it with chemo. I guess I don't really know what that means, I was too shocked to ask at the time and now feel like an idiot ringing up and saying 'you know how you told me it was incurable, does that mean I'm going to die.' Do doctors just assume we know what they're on about or is communication really this bad? I know I sound bitter but I have reason to be. I was misdiagnosed for months in emergency at the Royal Melbourne and in the colorectal clinic. They kept saying I had an absess, giving me antibiotics that didn't work... One doctor even had the audacity to suggest I was turning up to emergency in search of a doctors certificate for a day off... I just don't understand how so many doctors could be wrong. Anyway, the golfball sized primary is gone - with vigorous radiation and chemo. Unfortunately it learned to spread before it left... and now I'm walking around sleep deprived and scared. Well, that's about it for my first blog entry. I'm exhausted after that. ... View more