Thanks Cazza My hubby actually has had the bowel resection and has a bag - there are at least 2 others we regularly see with the same situation who have had their bowel resection regardless of the liver mets so I'm not sure how your situation differs. My husband had minimal changes with the folfox combo but had really good results with folfiri/cetuximab. The Sirt radiation is apparently only offered if a surgeon says that there is no possibility of resection. We have had to send further scan results off to the second surgeon so we are still in a holding pattern at the moment. We have the option of the radiation if the surgery is squashed by this second surgeon. Their have been some limited instances where the sirt radiation has then achieved even more shrinkage and allowed a resection but its probably along the same lines as winning lotto. Will update as soon as we get an answer! ... View more

Hi, so sorry to hear about your husband. My husband also has stage 4 secondary liver mets. He was diagnosed just prior to Christmas in 2012. It was the most devastating news to deal with - you will go through so many different feelings and it might be helpful to read about the "stages of grief", at the very least it will assure you that your feelings are normal and help you to recognise and deal with each stage. All of us know what you are going through - it is a painful emotional journey, eventually you will reach a point where you will be able to accept what is happening. In the meantime be kind to yourself, don't let this illness redefine your relationship with your husband. Be prepared to be the toughest you will ever have to be, use reputable sites such as these to educate yourself and go to appointments with questions - if you don't understand something ask again and again until they put it in language that you can follow. Define boundaries for family and friends early - people will want to visit and help in any way they can...this can be good but it is also very difficult to deal with the constant intrusions into your private space. I found that advocating for my husband to get optimum treatment allowed both of us to feel far more pro-active in dealing with his illness. If the treatment offered for your husband involves spending time in a chemo day unit be prepared to be pleasantly surprised, you will be surrounded by people who are happy and positive, they will discuss their illnesses openly - not in the hushed tones that "outsiders" use. They will be a fantastic source of information and support. If you are able to discuss your feelings with your husband, don't feel that you need to be strong for him, this is something that you are going through together and will be able to deal with if you support each other. It gets better, I promise. ... View more

Hi, my husband has the same condition. The only thing they "measure" with his bloods are whats called cea's. These are tumour markers that will decrease if the treatment is having an impact - a drop is good. ... View more

Hey just as an addition, I have jumped on good old google and found several surgeons who specialise with liver resections, checked out their credentials and eventually sent of an email to one that seemed the most well known in the field.Got a reply very promptly and an offer to see my husband and review his surgery options. I think the ongoing treatment was to important to accept one persons opinion, so we will see where we get to. ... View more

Hi Elvibee I am grappling with this issue at the moment from the other side. My husband aged 43 has stage 4 secondary liver cancer. We have been together for over 26 years - that is 10 years longer living together as a couple than he lived at home in his youth for. It is an incredibly difficult and painful journey for a family, particularly for our children. While they are now both in their late teens/young adults they have always had a very close bond with their father. It is very hard to find that balance between giving the extended family the time that they would like without it impacting on the time our family would normally spend together. As the carer I find it difficult to deal with people who treat us as sick person and nursemaid instead of husband and wife. If you can try to imagine this was you and your partner, how would you feel as a wife? As hard as it is your husband is a grown man, I know that my husband does not want his mother carrying out any personal care for him because he would find that very awkward. You say you are concerned he will die alone, but he has a wife and children who haven't abandoned him. As a mother you must have been incredibly proud to raise a man who went out into the world and made a life of his own. In going to the in-laws I believe that your husband has recognised that his wife needs people to support her while she is caring for him. Tell your son that you are worried and ask what you can do for his family, believe me you very quickly learn to take up the offers of help when its available. Cancer is a very personal journey and everyone deals with it in a different way, respect your sons decisions and he will continue to share with you. Most of all remember that your son now has a wife and family of his own, as the caring person you obviously are you will have instilled that in your son - his children will be one of his greatest priorities at the moment. Give them time to find the balance that they need and I'm sure they will welcome your involvement when the time is right for them. I wish your family all the best. ... View more