Ah, @dallarac , he's punishing you because he has cancer & you don't!  You are a strong woman & don't need him.  Maybe let him know that occasionally.  Just the hint of a threat that you might leave him, might be enough to change him.  Although some people will never change.  Is he on chemo at the moment?   Budgie ... View more

@mensana, I am fortunate enough to have a hubby that has accompanied me to every single one of my appointments since diagnosed.   Because I've been on chemo nearly every day, chemo brain is rife in my mind.  That, coupled with the amount of pain meds I'm on leads me to not trust my driving capabilities, so I haven't driven for quite a few years.  Hubby doesn't mind as it gets him away from work for a while 😉.   I'm glad you weren't badly affected by the Covid jab, as I've heard alot of people have been hit pretty hard by it.  Did you get the AZ or the Pfizer? You mentioned the similarities between the side effects of the chemo & Covid jab.  That has been an issue for me sometimes because so many drugs have the same side effects, & because of the cancer, I now take so many medications 😖.   But anyway, such is life!    Your next lot of chemo should run more smoothly for you.  It's all happening now & I'm very glad for you 🙂.   Take good care  Budgie      ... View more

Wow, he actually said that?  I'm so sorry.  I hope you enjoy your weekend away.  You deserve it! 🌻❤   Budgie  ... View more

Hi @Susan61 ,   You said it's been difficult to keep your mouth shut - well perhaps it's time you didn't.  He probably is very jealous that he has cancer & you don't.  But it's not your fault & he has no right to take it out on you, maybe you should stop walking on eggshells & tell him how it is.  He needs to get over his self pity & get on with living.  If he put his energy into getting better rather than abusing you, he'd have half the battle won.  Stage 4 isn't necessarily a death sentence, & attitude plays a major part in your recovery.   Lay down the facts for him, & suggest counselling because it really can help.  He has to take the first steps tho, & stop blaming you for his illness. Stay strong! All the best to you   Budgie    ... View more

Hi @mensana ,   I'm glad to hear things are finally on the move for you.  I really hope the treatment does a good job.  Take each day as it comes.  You probably won't notice many side effects from the radiation for a week or so. Some people don't have many side effects at all.   Do you have to travel from Humpty Doo every day or are you staying close by to the Alan Walker Centre?  When I was having my first lot of radiation, I had to travel from the Mornington Peninsula into Melbourne which could take anything from 40 minutes to 2 hours if there was an accident.   And while I  didn't have many side effects at the time, just the commute was enough to zap my energy.  So keep your strength up as much as you can. Good luck 😀   Budgie ... View more

Hi @Cazza1 ,  Welcome to the Community.   Sorry it's under these circumstances.   Try looking at things  this way - you can't change what has happened in the past, what's done is done; but you can control your future to a certain extent.   Try not to worry about what has happened, you can't change it; Concentrate on your future - do some research so you're prepared for what is to come; Try to get fitter before any surgery (depending on how much time you have), & continue gentle exercise during treatment; TALK with people, someone, anyone, a counsellor if need be - it really helps. You may find some people don't want to know you after a cancer diagnosis - this is when you find your true friends. Don't worry about the ones that fall away (if any) - you will be better off without them; Eat well & drink plenty of water;  Relax! & remember you can't change what has already happened.  You can always download on this site, & get some fabulous info from people who are members here.   Take care of yourself.    All the best Budgie          ... View more

I hope things work out for you. Cheers 🙂   ... View more

Hi @Juleforti ,   Your hubby is understandably angry at having cancer, but he has no right to be angry with or at you.   Is he on any chemo?  Some people get angry as a side effect from the chemo they're on, which could be the case with your hubby.  Try researching the side effects of his particular chemo.   If so, you could ask his onc to reduce the dosage, if possible.   Some people just become bitter because it's them with the cancer - why is it them & not someone else?  So they lash out at the people/person(s) they love.  Make him aware he's doing it - he may not actually realise that he's being angry.   Tell him to stop, he has no right to take it out on you.  Suggest counselling for him - it wouldn't hurt you to have some either.  Talking is one of the best ways of dealing with cancer & the effects it has on everyone around you.    I hope things improve for you.  Take care.   Budgie ... View more

Hi @Jesseth ,   LindaG is right about not making any major decisions just yet.  And before you decide to cut away your SO, talk with them.  They might be just fine with continuing the relationship with you & not having children biologically.   There are other options to having children like adoption.   There are an awful lot of kids without a parent to love them.  Besides, your partner may be happy to stay in the relationship & not have children at all.  Talk with your partner.    All the best Budgie ... View more

Hi @mensana ,   How is the pain level now?  I hope you're feeling better than you were.   What did you think of your oncologist?  I had a Dr Gupta when I went to the Alan Walker Centre.   I can't remember his first name, but I wasn't impressed.   I hope you have better luck.     ... View more