Hmmm... that’s a tough one... I could use them for GOOD ( get onto ordinary duties) or to help the Director of EVIL ( events, venues, itineraries and venues - aka my wife). Either way, it would keep me out of trouble. Hugs to all, Rick ... View more

Joking? I wasn’t! I was ripped off big time! Rick ... View more

Hi Captain,   Thanks for the positive message.   I managed to miss out on radiotherapy, but did complain loud and long about being juped that I didn't get super-powers following the PET scan.   My experience with abandonment was when I left hospital following my gastrectomy. No nurses (although with some that was a good thing), no doctors, no visitors (we live 60 km out of town) - just me, my wife and my cows.   I figure that people don't know how to deal with the trauma of cancer treatment until they experience it first or second hand. So avoidance is the easy way out for them.   So one way to get the attention that you want/need is, as you say, to step forward and start singing. That is, let the people who are important to you know that you are still alive and still want to be a part of their lives. If Mohommed won't come to the mountain, invite yoursel over to their places (or just call in unannounced) with a bottle of wine and some snacks in hand.   I can't imagine trying to do this all alone. Thankk goodness that I haven't had to.   A big hug and best wishes, Rick ... View more

I try to choose a positive attitude every day. And so my favourite morning song (every morning) is Good Day Sunshine by The Beatles. ... View more

Hey Phil, What went so wrong with your chemo that you ended up in the clink? What should others be looking out for? Hope you get through it really quickly. Big hugs to you and G. Rick ... View more

Cows... little ones at any rate. This  is back in Dec when they were up to about a month old. One mum was left in charge of creche for the morning.   ... View more

WTF, Did I just kill the conversatin or what? Sorry for whatever I said wrong. One thing that I missed regarding learnings from this site is... You never have to feel alone. If you are starting to feel alone or abandoned, just come here and join in on the conversations. Hugs to all, Rick ... View more

Hi Claire et al,   You might be sorry for asking for my thoughts. I have a tendency to go on and on about some (many) things. So strap yourself in for a rather long post – perhaps it should be posted in the Blogs section…   Learnings? Wow, talk about unconscious ignorance - so little awareness of what I didn't know about life, death, myself and those around me. Well diagnosis of cancer was one hell of a way to open my eyes to it all.   And bear in mind as you read this, I actually had a pretty easy time though my encounter with cancer. From the time that I entered that dark tunnel, my treatment was deemed curative rather than palliative. Two 9-week periods of chemo with a total gastrectomy in-between. No visible disfigurement other than cutting my hair off to disguise the loss of hair and the zipper line from the bottom of my sternum down to my navel. After the brief period of 9 months, I found myself emerging from the tunnel and back in the light again.   I guess the second biggest thing that I have learnt to appreciate is the importance of choosing my attitude each and every morning. I first learnt about this concept from the FISH! philosophy (look it up) back in the 90s. This is my new spin on it...   Essentially, we all have a finite lifespan. Some of us will live longer than others. Regardless, we don't know when our time will be up (well, not until it is too late). How many of my remaining days should I spend feeling sorry for myself and complaining about the cards that I have been dealt? Am I happy to be a passenger of my journey or do I want to be in the driver's seat?   So every morning when I woke up, and before I really become aware of what condition I was in, I tried to make a conscious decision about how I was going to approach the day. If I got it right, I would actively choose to be stronger than anything that can be thrown at me. Sometimes this worked and sometimes it didn't. But at least I started on the right foot. And if I didn’t manage to meet my own expectations, I had another chance to do better the next day, and the next, and the next.   But the most important thing that I have learnt is about communication - and this was from several perspectives. It was so important to let those around me know where my head was at and what I needed from them - and this changed innumerable times every day. But it was also just as important for me to find out what those supporting me needed from me. How can they help me if I am pushing them down while they are struggling to keep their own heads above water? We all share buckets of emotions – if we keep taking out more than we put in, there will be nothing left for anyone. As #PhilPepper mentioned, I wrote a series of Communiques to document my journey. I tried to write it in a style that was a mix of facts and humour. This was a way for me to reflect on what was happening and it also became a vehicle for me to let family and friends know what was going on without them needing to confront the situation head-on. That is not to say that I wanted to avoid talking with people. On the contrary, I relished every text message, email and phone call that I received. And the rarest treat was to have a visitor (we live 60 km north of Canberra and there is at least 8 km of gravel road, so we don’t tend to get visitors even at the best of times). When I did manage to get out and mingle, I attempted to squash any awkward moments by talking about my journey like an evangelist. My sermon always started with the statement “Apples saved my life…” and ended with “Get to know your body and if something doesn’t seem quite right do something about it before it is too late!”. Now as far as what I have learnt from this community: It is often easier to open up to strangers than it is to the ones we love most. Get talking to the ones you love, before they become strangers. We often know the answers to our questions before we post them, but it is reassuring to find out through others that we were right all along. Keep the questions and the responses coming. Cancer breeds empathy and compassion. Let’s all try to be there for anyone who needs a little help – both here and out in the real world. Well that’s it from me for now. As I said at the beginning, this is all a bit “easy” for me because I had it so easy with my treatment. So take what I have written here with a couple of pinches of salt.   Hugs to everyone, Rick ... View more

Hi nicole, Bl00dy h311. The blows just keep coming don't they? Did someone in your family history disturb a pharaoh's tomb or something? It is exhausting trying to be the pillar of strength for everyone all of the time. You need to find yourself an outlet where yo can let go to unload every now and then, and even have a cry if you need, just for sanity sake. Do you have an affectionate pet? They can be great therapy. Feel free to unload here anytime that you need it. We are here for everyone 🙂 Big hugs, Rick ... View more

Hi LeeRoy,   I am so sorry to hear of your suffering. I have no idea how I would manage to cope in a similar situation.   Perhaps it is time to have a discussion with your family about moving to Victoria.   My thoughts are with you. Rick ... View more