Hi @Ness1983,   Welcome to the CCOC! This is a wonderful site to ask questions and get a load off your shoulders.  As far as your question about what to do, I say “carpe diem” (seize the day). That is, try to pull your mood and thoughts up above the devastation that this condition is imposing on you.  Choose to be strong and even invincible - as much for your children as for yourself. For guidance, do a web search for the FISH! Philosophy. However, do allow yourself some time to let your emotions out. But do this as an exorcism rather than pitying yourself. Let it out under your control and then get back in the saddle and get on with being the immortal that you can be.  Treatments are getting more effective every day, so the chances are improving that you will survive a lot longer than otherwise expected. It is much better to face this extra time standing strong than huddled in a ball in the corner of your bedroom.  If anything in your treatment causes you significant concern, speak up and be heard. It  Remember that it is your life and your body. Don’t be a passenger in your journey - be a co-driver and be accountable to yourself as much as you demand that the medical staff be accountable to you.  The consequences of giving up are far more reaching than you might think.  Best wishes for your treatment.B ig hugs and keep us posted on your progress.  Rick ... View more

Hi @Stef89 ,  A scan can be very unnerving because of the problems that it might uncover. The resulting news could be reassuring or devastating.  However, knowledge is power. If there is something nasty going on, it is still going on whether or not you have the scan. Isn’t it better to know what (if anything) is happening and getting on to deal with it than to keep worrying about what might be festering away inside and even the chance of it getting worse? So a scan should be seen as an opportunity to reassure yourself that all that can be done IS being done to help keep you as healthy as possible.  Hazzar to scans! Hugs to you all, Rick ... View more

Hi @LottiePKemp ,   Welcome to this wonderful support site.    I hope that I am comprehending your question correctly - my apologies if not…   There are many varieties of orally administered cytotoxins (chemotherapy treatments). People with the same type of cancer often receive different cytotoxins. And people on the same treatment regime experience different side effects and different efficacy.  I received my chemotherapy treatment both orally (daily) and by infusion (drip via cannula into my arm - once every 3 weeks). I never got tested to see if I could receive oral treatment - it was just assumed to be appropriate.   So if you provide more details about your situation, we may be better placed to provide a more detailed and specific response to your question.  Best wishes, Rick ... View more

Hi @Janegio62 , It begs the question as to why he won’t eat while he is back with his family around him. Going without appropriate nutrition for more than a day or two is pretty serious for most people. I would call his doctor as a matter of urgency to discuss the situation and work out what is best for your Dad.  Best wishes and big hugs, Rick ... View more

If you speak with enough conviction and authority, people will believe (almost) anything.  WARNING: Don’t read this if you are looking for positive and heartwarming thoughts…   Of course they are winging it. They don’t know why some people get cancer and others don’t; why cancer sometimes spreads and sometimes doesn’t; why some cancers in some people respond to some cytotoxins while not for others with the same cancer.  I wish that I had a dollar for each time a medical professional has told me “everyone is different “. What a cop-out! If they REALLY knew what they were doing they would get it right the first time.  And don’t get me started on surgeons. To them, everything can be fixed with a knife - including the extensioins  to their 3rd holiday home.  My surgeon doesn’t even bother to read up on my case notes before seeing me - I have to remind him about what procedure he performed on me.  Please take all of my words here with a grain of salt. I’m sure that they all do the best that they can with the resources (time and information) available to them.  Rant over - hugs to you all.  Rick ... View more

Hi @janewolfe ,   Obviously written by clinicians; to be read by clinicians.   This is your life that they are talking about and you have every right to fully understand what they are writing and what it means for your treatment options and likely outcome.   However, I believe that it would be somewhat irresponsible any one of us to attempt to translate this.   You need to talk it through with your specialist or at least with your GP. They have access to the original scans and test results that led to this summary. Take someone with you as your advocate - to make sure that the doctors don't continue to baffle you with their technical terms and jargon. Don't leave until you get them to confirm that you can correctly explain back to them (in your own words) what it all means.   Good luck and big hugs, Rick     ... View more

Hi @Mick68 ,   I had total gastrectomy in Aug 2017. After 12 months, nearly everything was back to the way it was pre-cancer other than I: need to remember to eat and drink during the day have to make sure that I don't eat too much at a sitting can't eat sugary foods of any sort after the main course at dinner can't eat raw onion or shallots at any time need Vit B12 injection every 3 months am steady at 12 kg lighter (71kg) have difficulty understanding the messages that my gut is telling my brain - it is as if it is speaking a different language. Let me know if there is anything in particular that is worrying you and I will share my experiences.   Hugs to you and everyone reading, Rick ... View more

Beware when reconnecting. Some people don’t know how to respond and it can be too much for them.  So if you get a bad reaction, don’t blame them. Give them a little more time and try again giving specifics about what you want need. That will allow them to respond more objectively and get used to the situation. In time they will let their guard down and closer relationships will develop.  Hugs to all! Rick ... View more

The simple answer is that getting through anxiety is up to you. The big trick to it is having a loved one help to guide you through the perils that lie ahead.  This is rather easy for me to say because I was the one helping rather than the one suffering.  It has been said many times by many people, but you need to let go of the things that you can’t control. And that’s not so say “what will be will be”, but to choose your battles.  And if your GP recommends medication , don’t fight it. Medication is a tool that will help you to work out which battles are worth fighting. When you get stronger, your GP should start weaning you off them to a point where everything runs at an even keel.  The journey through anxiety can be harder than the fight through cancer - at least with cancer there is a physical presence to deal with and there are tests that will confirm how well you are doing.  Good luck, best wishes and a big hug, Rick ... View more

Hey @PhilPepper , You live in NSW now. Qld is still off limits to us. I am still denied visitation rights to my grandkids. Thank goodness for Skype. To @cemo-queen, Following my treatment, I started to reach out to long lost friends. Some welcomed me, while others didn’t respond at all to my multiple attempts. I tried reaching out both for my own desire to be remembered, but also to warn them about the tragedy that can come from ignoring the subtle messages that your body sends  through to your consciousness. Messages that need to be listened to and acted on before it is all too late.  I shared my story with anyone who would listen. This did trigger some to get symptoms checked out. But in the end “you can lead a horse to water, but can’t make it drink“. This hasn’t really addressed the points from your original post, but be assured that people here will listen and be your companion through this unpleasant journey called canc er. Big hugs to you, Rick ... View more