i think you’ve done an amazing job so far but it’s a lot to deal and process - if you don’t feel comfortable talking with family - perhaps see if there’s a therapist available that you could talk to? If you’re still at school - it might be worth seeing if they have options available.   Stage 3 isn’t a death warrant though still extremely serious - it’s hard to consider it but are there things that are important to you and your family? Doing movie nights? Or eating dinner together?? If you can - try and focus on these so that your dad can have a bit of normality. But really - take care of yourself first and try to have a bit of a life outside of this - even if it’s a casual job or focusing on school. Not only does it give you other things to think about but it gives you other stuff besides cancer to talk with to your dad and family 🙂  ... View more

Hi JJ1, I'm very sorry to hear about your Dad and what he's going through. I say this as a patient, but also as the son of a father who died of bowel cancer. I think a lot of what you are describing could be a coping mechanisim. It can be very difficult to accept that the end of your life is rapidly approaching, especially if there are many things that you have not completed that you wanted to. Dealing with the fact that the end of your life is rapidly approaching can be very confronting.   Determining how long one has left to live is, I think, an educated guess. My Dad wasn't given very long to live, but extended that many times over.   As to whether it is fair to your father to ask the oncologist about life expectancy, perhaps discuss with your Dad that you would like to discuss this with the oncologist with him. Check with him so that he doesn't get any rude surprises during the meeting.   Best of luck JJ1.   -sch ... View more