Hello Cathie I'm so sorry to hear about your husband's diagnosis.  My husband sadly passed away in May 2022.  I'm nearing the first anniversary of his death.  What I'm most grateful for is that I was able to spend every moment of the 10 months with the most beautiful person I've ever met in my life, before he passed.  He fought a battle I'll never know and the chemo treatment had side effects that he didn't always share with me. I think he had more courage and love for me that he kept pushing through. My husband was my best friend and loving partner.  I have memories, which can either make me laugh or cry.  I think everyone's cancer journey is unique to them.   I could rant about the time we'll never have, but I will always be thankful for the time that we did have.   I hope you have family and friends who can support you during this time. Carolyn ... View more

G'day Steve, hi Linda. I got your PM's, thanks for that. I'm just about to start my final edit, which is about the twentieth final edit I've done so far. Writing is so interesting. You can read through a passage a hundred times, and then suddenly spot a typo.   I do really appreciate your interest in this thing and I'd be honoured to send you a copy each. I'll just do this final check and then I'll send it to you, so give me a few days please.   Oh and it's free, of course. The publishing world is interesting at the moment, and the big players all seem to have a similar stance on content, that being that they won't entertain any material that could be seen as controversial, aka politically incorrect.  To which I think, hmmm, they are definitely not going to be interested in this material.    Other than that, I've got a procedure tomorrow morning to put in a catheter to drain the fluid from around my right lung, after which it's business as usual, I suppose.   Take care, guys. talk again soon.   Colin         ... View more

G'day , Steve, hi all. Thanks for your words, Steve, and you're right. It is a constant battle to stay positive, but I am managing in that respect. I think it's because I've got some goals to complete before I go - leaving a legacy with my book, for starters. It's nearly there, just a few touch-ups and final edits. If you guy are interested, let me know and I'll email you a copy over the next few weeks. We'll work out a way to exchange email addresses in private, no problems, and if nothing else, it should give you a laugh.   Just as an update for you, I had an appointment with my pain specialist this morning. I had to get my wife to drive me there because I was in too much pain and really dizzy. She changed my meds completely, after concluding that the others simply weren't cutting it.  They were working, but not enough, because the pancreatic component of the cancer has triggered a whole heap of nerves in my back and my abdominal area. But fortunately, the new one, just a tiny pill, kicked in immediately and I've just spent the entire day feeling pretty good. Medication sure does have its place, and it's great when you find one that works.   Take care all, and have a great night. I just discovered some oldies but goldies on Spotify 🙂   Colin               ... View more

Thanks, ED, more kind words. You people out there are fantastic.  I like what you say about peace and comfort, and it's true. I just remarked to my wife that with all that's happening, I'm feeling overwhelmed with peace at the moment. I can feel love coming from everywhere, from family and friends. It's as though I'm not allowed to worry about anything. My controlling force won't allow me to.    I'm sorry to hear about your father.  If it's any consolation, if he left this world feeling just half as peaceful as I do now, then he's in a great place right now.   Colin ... View more

Cheers, Steve, and I echo your thoughts right back at you. It's funny, isn't it, and I've always been curious about words, too. There are so many mediums for connecting with others, but it's on that deeper level that it really counts. Ironically,  we often connect with those others based purely on words, and I understand what you mean about storage on the web thing.   But as I said before, words say so much, and it's the simplicity of them that makes that type of communication so effective.  It's difficult to comprehend on occasions that someone is typing those words, and we have no idea who they are, what they look life and so on. But then again, does it matter, really? A connection is a connection, and words of comfort, from any source, are an invaluable thing.   I'll say it again and I always will, mate, keep fighting the fight. Mine's different, it's shown its strength and metastasized. Yours hasn't, so kick its fucking ass. And in the meantime, be happy.   Colin ... View more

Steve and Linda, again, thanks for the kind words. I've always looked at life beyond death in a simple way when it comes to crossing over. There are simply too many stories out there of people passing over and seeing loved ones waiting for them, or something else; some kind of light or way forward. Many skeptics (ya gotta love skeptics) profess that it's just the mind shutting down, and it's the way they say it so resiliently, almost dismissably, that gets me. It makes me say, how the fuck would you know? What makes you a goddamned expert? I mean, have you died before and know what it's all about, or are you just echoing the thoughts of others?   Everyone seems to have an opinion, which is everyone's right, of course. But, the fact remains, no one will truly know until the big moment arrives. No one. And for what it's worth, my own experience with orbs, and from discussions I've had with others, mainly the elderly (I used to do a lot of community work), I have my own views.   As I've said before, I refuse to believe that all this information gathering we go through in our lives means nothing. As we all sit here now, we have private thoughts, uniquely our own, many of which embody life itself, not just existence.    As for current symptoms, well, the pain is getting worse and I'm about to ask for my meds to be increased, and the weight is falling off of me. I always averaged just over 90kgs, though for a while I did go through a deliberate fat phase in my mid-fifties and shot up to 108kgs.  I ran out of wearable clothes at that point, which is what prompted me to get back into training again and to give up the morning spinach and ricotta rolls. Damn they were nice, and that bakery in the city drew some serious crowds most of the day.    Right now, though, I'm down to 75.3kg. But as with any negative, there is a positive. I can now eat what I damn well like. Spinach and Ricotta rolls? Chocolates. Cakes. Anything considered bad by normal dietary standards. Bring it on!   Positivity with cancer and food. It's a concept that I fully embrace 🙂   Colin     ... View more

G'day, Steve, hey Linda. Linda I'm so happy that you beat your foe and are continuing to do so. And Steve, hang in there, buddy. I'm still learning heaps, but the fact that your  Stage 3 cancer hasn't metastasized is a good thing. Hope remains, and with the strength you're displaying, you have  a great chance of kicking this thing once and for all.   For my part, I've compartmentalized things. By that, I mean that I'm now going through an organising phase.  I'm saying my goodbyes gradually, and I'm writing letters to family and friends, all with that individual touch.    Strangely, though, oh and I'm thinking completely straight as I'm writing this, over the past week I've begun receiving strange messages in the early morning hours. They come in the form of a an invitation to get up and make a coffee, and then go out the back and talk, to 'it' over a smoke.   It, I have now concluded, is the force controlling this current existence. It's all quite peaceful, and sometimes I do get up, but mostly I stay in bed until it gets light.   There's something it wants me to know, and I will find that out I'm sure. I'll be sure to let you all know what that message is, but until then, I'm just going to keep going through this very important process of acceptance and saying my goodbyes.   There is now an almost overwhelming feeling of peace surrounding me. The world as I've known it for nearly sixty years now, is changing.   Colin     ... View more

Hey guys, thanks again for the kind words. Oh and BJ,  feel free, man,  to keep me informed about yourself, as well, if you want to . And you, Linda. I guess we're already riding this crazy train together, anyway.   Remember how I said, in part, that my perceptions are now changing, that what I have long believed to be an important truth may not actually be one after all?   Well, I'm noticing something else now, too, and it's quite exciting, really. My perception of time is changing. What feels like happened a full fortnight ago, only happened 8 days ago, and time, generally, has become less important to me.   Tunes and songs last who knows how long, and who really cares? Generally they're longer, but again, that doesn't mean a thing any more, and in a good way. I'm never rushing to be anywhere. I'm never rushing, at all.   I'm just chilling, guys. Just chilling.   Colin     ... View more

Hello, Annette, how do I send a PM please? I  want to pass on my phone number to someone.   Colin ... View more

Hello Karen, so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I, too, have S4 advanced pancreatic cancer, identified at stage 3 last July,  but recently diagnosed as terminal after it metastasized to my lungs and liver in April this year.   I've been doing the whole chemo and radiation thing since initial diagnosis, but since the latest development, I have opted away from these treatments and am going it alone, basically, with pain killers and the like.   Obviously there is much I can tell you about my journey so far, and I may be able to help you, to a degree, with the emotion side of things, as well as the physical journey this disease takes us on.   Let me know if you're interested in talking. I'm going to work out how to PM you my phone number. My name is Colin, by the way. I'm 59, nearly sixty, and I'm from Perth WA.   Colin ... View more