I would like to say how amazed I am, how strong everyone on this site is. You are all inspirational. My Dad was diagnosed in March 2011, with lung and brain cancer. A man who has worked his butt off all his life to give his kids everything that they could ever wish for, and should be enjoying retirement. Unfortunately that is not the case. Dad was told that he would have 3 to 6 months. Devastating and gut wrenching don't even come close to explaining how I felt. But thankfully he is still with us today. However the chemo and radiation has now stopped, because the Doctors have said that their is nothing more than can do except for make him as comfortable as possible. Dad has always been my strength and wisdom, and the person I always turned to. My Mum is Superwoman! Not much else I can say bout Mum, other than she is the most beautiful woman. The love that I see between my Mum and Dad is just absolutely beautiful. They have been married for 45 years in September and still hold hands whilst watching TV, or when Dad could still walk, would hold hands walking down the street. I am not close with my brother and sister. My fiancee and my 2 beautiful kids have been wonderful throughout the past 16 months. No matter how much pain Dad is in, he always has a smile on his face, and I think this is because he doesn't want to cause us any extra pain. One of the hardest parts for me is that my fiancee and I have just set a wedding date, and Mum and I agreed that we would not tell Dad because we don't want to upset him, as he is not expected to be with us at that time. That is hard when you are "Daddy's little girl".
11 Comments
Pamela
Contributor
Hi Suzie I am so sorry about your Dad - life can be so hard at times. Could you consider two wedding dates? A special little one at home for your Dad to attend and the other one as planned? I am sure when your Dad is no longer with you, your memories of such a day together would abide in your heart with a sense of thankfulness for having made a special time for him. May you and your fiancée experience the same wonderful love your parents enjoyed for such a long time. Warm hugs of strength and comfort to you all, Pamela 🙂
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wombat4
Contributor
It is devastating when told the treatment is not working and will be discontinued, its is a time we thought would never arrive, because we thought something would happen to turn this around, hoping for a miracle I guess and then it dosnt arrive. My wife and I had been married for 37yrs when she retired age 55, we were going to have such a lovely retirement, she was dx with terminal cancer 11 months later. Cancer may have taken her, but it cannot take the love we have for each other. All strength to you and your family.
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tatsoi
Contributor
Hi Suzie, oh so touching hearing you admire your parents and the love they have! these are such special things to remember. I also have such admiration for my dad and my mum who are going on the journey of a brain tumour. (my dad has the cancer...but i guess it affects us all..in different ways). They are enjoying many of the moments they have together. and I'm enjoying the ones I have when I see him too. It's so bittersweet. So wonderful to be fully present and consciously being with him....but also feeling the loss and sadness of what may come. ...wishing you beautiful times with your dad...I'm sure he loves spending time with you and your little ones too! x
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glenys48woods
Contributor
Hi pamela, I feel that u have put this real good to this person as I agree with you. She must have gold in her heart for her father. it would be a great idea to have some wedding time with her Dad as it would be memeries for her and her family later. pamela u have got great ideas to comfort people. I am so sorry to hear about your Dad too. Glenys x
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Pamela
Contributor
Thank you, Glenys for your kind words but I don't take credit for the words I use. I am often surprised at what I write when I re-read it. I have faith and trust in God/Jesus and believe he gives me words of comfort to give to others. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us. I think that summarises it for this whole site, even though some may not feel the same way. Warm hugs, Pamela 🙂
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glenys48woods
Contributor
Hi Pamela, I am a religous person myself and the Book the Bible is the best book. God healed me through this experience with breast cancer. Sometimes words are hard to say when people who are suffering or going through a hard time. This person who is going through a hard time she is really strong and careful I think. I can't imagine going through it the second time. God gives us comfort to give to others as He promised to do so. I am a SDA Glenys xxx
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glenys48woods
Contributor
Hi Wombat, Nothing can take away the love that u have for your wife Wombat. Cancer took her but love didn't. I am glad you have said that Wombat. My husband Colin and I have been married for 38 years on the second day of spring just recently. Married in 1974. You must have been greatly disappointed about the retirement ending then she having cancer 11 months later. I recon u still are greatly disappointed and miss her terribly after 9 months. I reconise this Wombat. Glenys xx
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suziemk77
Not applicable
Hi to all those that have made such beautiful comments and support about my blog. I have been meaning to get back and thank you all before this date, but life happens and I just did not get the chance to. It is with great pain and sadness that I write that my father passed away on Fathers Day, 2nd September. I did not get the chance to a have a special wedding ceremony with him as suggested by Pamela, although I had taken her advice and it was planned. I know Dads pain is gone now, and I have to keep telling myself that, but it certainly does not make it any easier. Mum has been so strong this past week especially seen as it was Mum and Dads 45th Wedding anniversary yesterday. I wish I could channel some of Mums strength.
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peanutz
Frequent Contributor
I'm sorry for your loss, Suzie.
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Pamela
Contributor
This is such a sad time for you and your family, Suzie. Sending prayers of compassion and warm hugs of comfort, Pamela.
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SILLY
Super Contributor
Suzie,I have only just read now that your dad has gone . My condolences to you and your family .
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