Thank You

[donnai]

To those of you who sent your well wishes after I posted my first blog "Where to start" I would like to say a big Thank You.. Unfortunately my mum passed away on thursday (17/9/09) after a very short but grooling battle with lung cancer.. Mum was only diagnosed with cancer 8 weeks age and we only learnt that it was terminal about 2 weeks ago.. Mum passed away at Holoywood Pallative care unit.. the staff were amazing...Mums admission was a recommendation by her onchologist at her routine appointment on Tuesday. A meeting was organised with our family only 16hrs after mum was admitted. At this meeting we were told that mum would pass anytime from then and the next 48hrs....Mum passed away 29 hrs later... Myself, my dad and my grandmother (mums, mum) never left her side. This has all been such a surreal experience.. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think i would witness a persons last breath, let alone my own mums.. I just dont understand how we got here.. 8 weeks ago we were told her cancer didnt need treatment 2 weeks ago we were told her cancer could be treated but not cured which gave her a prognosis of up to 2 years Friday the 11/9/09 we were told she had a progosis of up to 6 months Then Tuesday we are told she had less than 48hrs... I just don't get it... Last week I was stunned that my life was then all about tests, appointments and medications.. Now its all caskets, burial plots and viewings. I cant believe we are expected to organise all this stuff when I feel like my heart and world was been ripped apart only days ago.. Mums funeral is this Thursday.. I just want his week to be over with.. I dont know how to process what has happened with so much going on.. I seem to only have time to cry when I am laying in bed trying to fall asleep... I wake every morning exhausted as I dont know if I have slept or just cried the night away... I may be regarded to as "The Rock." But this little rock feels like it is crumbling as it goes rolling of the cliff...

[AmandaC]

Hi Donnai, I am so so sorry to hear your mum passed away, my thoughts are with you and your family. You and your family have had such a traunatic experience, because it happend all so unexpectadly it is going to take some time to process. What you have experienced is one of the hardest things we'll experience in our life time. My husband lost his father 2 years ago, we had no idea he was on borrowed time and being with him in his final moments and planning the aftermarth was just so surreal. My husband still is trying to work through it all, its so traumatic it takes time. My husband was classified the rock as well, unfortunatley for him it has prolonged breif and everyone still expects him to be a rock. I just wanted to offer you big hugs and say be kind to yourself, it is ok to fall apart and feel the emotions. luv amandaXX

[Jules2]

Hiya Donnai My thoughts are with you and your family also. A tough time for you at the mo! I was with my father when he passed away and although it was tragic i am glad we were there with him at the end. Julie

[donnai]

Thanks Julie It was really lovely that you took the time to reply to my message.. I hope you are well, fit and fighting this crappy disease.. Take Care of you Donna

[donnai]

Thanks Amanda for your kind words.. I have 2 weeks of schools holidays ahead of me.. i am a school teacher so these holidays could not come at a better time.. They were also a time when I would catch up with mum and we always had a special day at the movies...Every Monday, of Every school holidays for the past 12 years... It will be a memory I will cherish but one I will miss so deeply.. Thanks for your support..