“And when are you going to, you know, die”, she said with discerning tactlessness. Do you want that in weeks, months or years Dear? Bless you Dear, it’s not for me to know the workings of the Lord’s mind. Not in your lifetime Honey, if I’m really lucky. Not anytime soon, I’m sure you’ll be pleased to know. Just gossip! Got any other insensitive questions? Not anytime soon. Have you heard any other good rumours? I am not sure. Oh, and are you still cheating on your husband? I don’t know, oh, and good luck with your STD! I’ll send you a card, if they are still making mail deliveries then. I’ll send you a card from heaven, if they make deliveries to where you are going. Do you mean statistically or by my Horoscope. It’s only a rumour that I’ve got the plague you know. I’m still not sure, but when I have a date, you’ll be the first to know. Not for ages, the crematorium has stopped taking advanced bookings. Not for ages, we can’t afford it. Not for ages. I’ve decided not to make any more long-term plans. Thanks for asking. I’ll add you to my heartless friends list. They all want to be the first to know. I bet I know what your next question is. How long is a piece of string? If I could answer your question I would be God, and I would be very unhappy Jan. If there was the slightest chance of answering your question, there would be an equally small chance you’d understand it. It’s been found statistically, that people who have the nerve to ask that question, have a better then even chance of having a sudden and violent death.
7 Comments
samex
Regular Contributor
Ahh Borderline. I did enjoy the final couplet!(IS it a couplet if it doesn't rhyme? I should know this). Anyway - it reminded me of a friend's comment (actually still a friend) when I was diagnosed. I have a very good State Super scheme which has a very lucrative retirement pension attached. Her comment to me was whether I would now be taking the lump sum on retirement? I can't recall what I replied but it certainly stuck in my mind. I'm also with you in that I'm not going for ages! A great read Borderline. S
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harker
Frequent Contributor
"I've actually only got about ten minutes left. So glad you're with me...Hey, come back!"
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Not applicable
Not till I am 90+ ... I refuse to go quietly! Reindeer
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Jules2
Super Contributor
Recent insensitivies: "Don't sweat the small stuff" in regards to travelling 200km twice a week. "Cancer is the major illness to get, if you have to get one" obviously the person that said this has never had cancer or any major illness. "Would you mind typing updating the list of people that have died from cancer?" One of the people on this list I met whilst having treatment. "It’s been found statistically, that people who have the nerve to ask that question, have a better then even chance of having a sudden and violent death." This last sentence really made me chuckle. Thank you!
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vinouche
Contributor
Thank you for the chuckle s
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Not applicable
Absolutely love your beautiful "wit" Borderline 😉 That is so well written. You know people never cease to amaze me just how tactless & insensitive they can be. It makes me wonder if some people have any feelings or just don't give a sh** until it happens in their own back yard? Who knows? The way i look at it if we don't laugh we cry far too much so i'd much rather be able to have a laugh at my own expense & never lose my sense of humor no matter what! Thanks for the great read Borderline 🙂
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Lynn
Not applicable
Thank you Borderline, I really needed a good chuckle. Lynn
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